[sophie82]

Hi, where to start. I hope this is the right place to write this as there is no where else that seems to help partners of people dealing with methadone and tapering off.

So my partner of 4 years has been on methadone for about 10 years. When I met him he didn’t tell me about this (I was training to be a nurse) but he eventually said after we’d been dating for a few months. He wasn’t drinking or taking street drugs, always put in a clean test when asked. He wanted to come off of the methadone and was taking 120ml daily.

I vowed to help and support where I could and felt that my nurse training might help me doing research etc. I soon found out how difficult this would be. There’s been hardly any help, we’ve had to do everything ourselves and there’s not much on the Internet to help. How is anyone expected to get off of this green stuff?

Over the last 4 years he’s come down to 10ml daily. We found out he had hypergonadism due to the opiates and started taking testosterone therapy which in itself was so hard. He has mood swings, i don’t know who I’m waking up next to most days. We have no sex life, he’s no libido but still won’t entertain other ways to be intimate with each other which has just decimated my self esteem and self worth. We hardly hug or if i try anything other than a kiss on the lips i get laughed at. He hardly works due to the withdrawals and always suffers badly after each drop. I’m really struggling.

He’s so close to coming off the methadone but I’m now at the end of my patience with it. I probably sound selfish but these 4 years of my life have been so difficult. I love him, but everything is all about him and I feel like my life is on hold and I’ve had to work 2 jobs to look after him and my son, his mood swings made my other son move to his dad’s.

I think I just need some reassurance that we’re nearly at the end of this and life will get much better but I cry nearly every day. I’m scared he’ll be the Hyde part of his personality once he’s off the meds and not the Dr Jekyll I fell In love with if you get what I mean?

Can anyone help?

[icarus-trust]

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m sorry to read of your partner’s methadone addiction and the big effect it’s having on you.

The Icarus Trust is a charity that has been set up to support people, like you, who are dealing with addiction in their family because we know how tough this is. If you contact us one of our trained Family Friends would listen to you and try to support you. They would also be able to tell you what other support may be available for yourself as well as your partner.

You can contact us on contact@icarustrust.org

All the best to you.

[willbebetter123]

I know a man who was a heroin addict for 10 years while doing his job as a nurse. He no longer takes heroin and is still a nurse and living a happy life. He’s around 50 now. So there is hope and I wish you all the best.

[Author]

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