[navy]

Hello

im so sorry to read this, it’s so awful when you find out that the person you fall in love with isn’t really the person you fall in love with as they lie.
do you think the chatty outgoing girl you met was clean of drugs or used when she met you?
you said you had the conversation about drugs and how you feel about them however she still used on separate occasions.
they are good at lies they tell you want you want to hear. I don’t think if she is still going out with friends that use that she doesn’t on a night out.
if she wants to be with you and you need to trust her perhaps she could do drug testing for you or something similar to prove that her love to you means more than the drug and will test the following day after her night out ? Then you can build the relationship back up from there?
I hope all works out for you and you find a way of communicating and trusting her and she proves that her love for you is stronger than the pull of the drugs.

take care

navy x

[Gaz105]

When I met her she’d been on coke socially for about 20 years with this group of friends. They’re all socially addicted. I though my girlfriend had changed since we had a conversation 3 years ago when she agreed to stop taking drugs. She still to this day tells me she’s not taken coke and its only the 3 occasions on holiday where she’s taken pills. Because of all the lies I’m now questioning if she’s had coke over the last 3 years, even if it’s only a tiny amount. I’m never going to know and I get what you’re saying about giving her drug tests after a night out but that really isn’t any way to live in my opinion. We’ve both been through previous marriages and I though this was our time now to find peace with one another and just live a nice life. I’m just shattered by this. I’m 40 now and she’s approaching 50. I don’t wanna live like this and the trust is ruined.

[navy]

Hi gaz105

i get it, I know the trust issue is so hard to get over. If she has changed since you met her and it was only the time she went away and you love her so much then you need peace of mind. I’m not sure how much this affects her if it’s socially taken as the comedown is noticeable can you see a difference in her when you’re out with her to when she is out with her friend’s. I do hope that you keep talking to her and she showers you with love and honesty and can get passed this.

I wish you all the best and please just post on here anything you need as there’s lots of us going through this and there’s some whom were cocaine takers and have stopped who give advice.

take care

navy xx

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