[zwq]

Hi. My son 36 has depression anxiety under mental health. He pleaded to go to rehab as none where available on nhs. We paid.£14k. He came out our son again positive looking forward. Now 11 weeks later back drinking again. Having drink seizures wanting to end it all don’t want to be here. He has so much to look forward to. I’m spending more time here than at home. 2wks ago I stayed at his house 3 days n nights. Thought he was back on course. But no. I have told him I have to tell his x partner he’s drinking because of the kids. We have paid debts off so he could pay us back monthly and be stress free. But this is his 5th bottle of vodka in as many days at least. I can’t turn my back on him but it’s making me and hubby ILL. If I don’t tell her I may loose contact with the kids as I’ve been a go between. I have said we will always be there for him. But what can I do. He won’t listen. Been asleep most of the day while I have been down here since 2.45am when he text me.asking to get vodka. I did that so he wouldn’t walk the dog. Yes probably blackmail. I took a bottle down that I had confiscated two weeks ago. He took it and said he was gonna end it. Done. So I rang the police. They came very quiet n respectful but as he said he was ok. Could only file a report. I have had little sleep again sat crying feeling helpless again. I have got in touch with my dr as I am getting ectopics. Not has them for years. I have been contacting all people he is under but he wouldn’t speak with his care worker. His psychologist is calling soon I am scared to say right that’s it you sort your self in case he ends it. But he’s not looking after himself or his dog. His friend says we have done so much. But we have to look after ourselves. He’s my son. What can I do? I’m a helper by nature. I feel like I’m deserting him. But maybe he needs the shock. When he’s drunk I can’t leave the dog there. He loves her. But it’s not fair. Then he will have no kids to visit or her. Please give me some advice. I’m at my whits end …

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