Hi Bev,
It is very sad to read of your son’s drug use and how it affects all your family as well as himself.
I work for a charity called The Icarus Trust that provides support to the family and friends of those with addictive behaviours. We have a team of experienced volunteers called Family Friends who would listen to you and help you to find the help that you want. May be talking with one of them will help you to feel less desperate.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
I you can get some support. Good luck.