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My 17 year old has been using drugs and has been convicted of stealing from shops to fund it. He has also stole from us too. We moved over 200 miles for a fresh start only for it to be twice as bad. Yesterday he smashed the house up as I wouldn’t give him any money. I phoned the police and he was arrested for criminal damage. He has been bailed with conditions he stays away from the home, with the recomendation I take out a restraining order against him.
I have no idea where he is or who he is with. I sent him a text asking if they housed him, to which he was abusive and said I wasn’t his mum anymore and I am dead to him.
I am struggling massively with all this. The abuse I am used to, it’s not knowing if he has a roof over his head or if he is eating etc, all the mum things. I can’t sleep, eat or function properly and haven’t stopped crying for 2 days.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation please?
Thank you x
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Hi Michelle, I really feel for you. My son is much older, 32, and I have not spoken to him or seen him since November 18. He has been using cocaine for over 10 years and this has resulted in 2 relationship breakdowns and him not seeing his children. He now lives with his gf so I know he is safe but is probably still using. Over the years he has lived with us and we have bailed him out financially and supported him many times. It seems to me that you have already taken drastic steps i.e. moving home. I understand what you mean about all the mum things and it breaks my heart that my son does not communicate with me. Have you any idea where your son can be? Is he at college? Does he have any friends who he could be staying with? As part of his police conditions has he not got to take part in drug counselling etc. For yourself maybe you could get in touch with a local drug counselling service for you as a parent. I am not sure if any if this helps as your son is much younger. I am sure that if your son needs you he will contact you but maybe you have to be tough with him. The one thing that Imhave learned is that no matter how much you offer your support unless he wants to stop taking drugs nothing much will change. I wish you all the best and feel free to ask anything else.
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Hi my daughter is 17 and has been taking Xanax on and off since last May. This has caused our family huge stress. She shop lifts and puts herself in great danger .
What is your son taking?
In my experience, yes they say some horrendous hurtful things but really they are vulnerable and don’t know what to do!
We are at our wits end with it all as you are. This is an ongoing problem for us . I feel for you I really do .
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