[tinyninja]

Hi all

New here and relatively new to all this. Looking for some advice.

Last July I started dating a guy who was 5 months into recovery (I now know that’s not advisable for him to do).

We had an amazing 7 months, he was doing great, although he was putting a lot of pressure on himself to achieve a lot very quickly.

He has a history of mental health issues, deep rooted very traumatic stuff from his childhood.

A month ago out of the blue he started distancing himself from everyone. He completely shut his family out and his contact with me was becoming less frequent.

I eventually found out he has relapsed. Obviously there was tension but I supported him as best I could. He assured me he didn’t want to continue and would stop again. He didn’t.

It was a long distance relationship and his contact continued to dwindle, it felt like when I wasn’t physically with him he’d forget I existed.

Sunday just gone, I’d had enough, told him I was fed up of the way he was treating me, that I wanted to be with him and support him but he had to take into account my feelings. I’m ashamed to say I screamed and shouted (out of frustration).

In one conversation he said said he wanted to be with me, didn’t know if he wanted to be with me; didn’t want to be with me. And that was that, we were over.

He said he didn’t deserve to be happy and didn’t think he’d ever settle down.

His family are sadly used to these episodes and have said they think he’s scared and running away from me. That he doesn’t think he deserves me.

I want to support him but at the minute I’m leaving him be, he’s shut himself away and I don’t want to force the issue.

But I have no clue what to think about what’s going to happen. I feel like I’m in limbo and I have no idea what I should do

Any advice or shared stories would be amazing

Thank you ????

[danman83]

Whats he an addict of?

[tinyninja]

He has lapsed with cannabis but has said that the amount he was using was increasing and in the past this has always led to using harder drugs there aren’t many he hasn’t used

[danman83]

But hes not on the harder drugs is he? Like addicted to them like cannabis?

I was really bad on weed from age14 to 18.. i made my mums life hell im afraid to say. Some was hormornes.

I realised i had to stop as i was going nowere in life, i hung around with bums and i was one.

I skipped job interviews , and other various things. I hated it in the end.

But the main thing is.. i wanted to quit. And i set my self goals with a calender, crossing each day as it came. I lapsed a few times but i got there in the end.

Hr needs a new circle of friends and change his routine around. Take up the gym or something

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