[trainer28]

My partner has agreed to go to rehab for 28 days soon. Any advice on how to help support him before and after this? Especially after! Thanks. We really want this to work for our relationship and children

[nikkell015]

Hi I’m in the same situation as you my husband is in just now for 28days and it’s hard cause I have so much anger towards him I had my first visit the other day with him and he has told me they are putting him forward for a 3 month rehab stay he suffers depression and alcohol addiction … he want to do the 3 month stay which I’m happy about cause it is showing he really is willing to try change his lifestyle .. I’m visiting and trying to stay positive but really don’t know what it will be like when he comes home I’m scared cause I don’t know if our marriage can be saved but the only advise I can give you is to try stay positive.. that’s the way I’m dealing with it just now cause I’m scared if I tell him my fears about our marriage it will make him go well what is the point even though he is telling me he is in there for him and our family to get us back to what we had before all this happened I wrote a post about how I was feeling the other day … but just knowing that your partner has agreed to go in is a good sign so good luck and stay strong xx

[trainer28]

Hi, thanks for your reply, I didn’t see your original post but have just read it now. It makes so much sense to me because I also have a certain amount of anger and bitterness and it comes and goes depending on what’s going on.

It’s so confusing when you see the man you fell in love with as he was again but then alcohol or other substances take over.

I can also relate to the fact that you don’t want to tell him the truth about how you’re really feeling whilst he’s in rehab. My partner actually said that I’ll finish it anyway even if he does get clean but I told him not to think about us and our relationship but to think about him being healthy and recovering no matter what happens afterwards, I hope that’s the right thing to do!

Maybe you could live apart when he gets out so he can take responsibility for himself but remain married and have some kind of relationship? It may force him to live an alcohol free life, who knows.

Thanks for the advice about staying positive, you are right, we’ve got to have hope right?!

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