[shelly]

Hi all, my partner has smoked cannabis since he was a teenager, last year he completed a rehabilitation course and he was clear of it for 6/7 months. Then it started again he started off pretending he weren’t having it and was having it now and then but then I found out he was back on it, he is not as bad as he used to be but I have told him he is making me unhappy and I don’t want him smoking it and he is prepared to walk away from the relationship to continue smoking it! Any advice on what to do would be great full!

[jbetty122]

I used to smoke weed as a teenager. I loved the stuff. Could never see me stopping. But I hated it by the end. Smoking it at home alone caused me massive paranoia and guilt. It made me useless and I just wanted to sleep as soon as I had done it. I went to Amsterdam and passed out in a coffee shop I was that high. It put me off for life. I got with a girl and still smoked. But then one day I stopped. Just like that. I had the odd drag now and again but on the whole I probably haven’t bought weed in over ten years. Then I quit smoking one day when I woke up and just decided to stop. However. I have always drank and dabbled in cocaine. I cannot shake either of those habits… so I’m guess I’m saying weed is a fairly easy habit to kick, but if he has an addictive personality such as me, he will just replace it.

I have a friend who sounds exactly like ur bf. He has smoked weed for 15-16 years everyday. And wants to stop for his gf and start a family. He can’t do it. She tolerates it but secretly hates it.

I’m not sure what problems it cause though. Weed is near enough a legal drug. But I can’t imagine everyone taking it up as readily as alcohol if it becomes legal. Why don’t u like it? Because it is an illegal substance? Or because if how it makes him behave? Or something else?

[shelly]

I don’t like it because it changes him as person, he has no motivation in himself and his attitude just changes, it is as if his life revolves around it! He is saying that to me as in the past he used cocaine and ketamin to substitute not using cannabis! I wouldn’t mind if I could just trust him to have one of a night before bed but he wouldn’t do that and it’s all the lies and sneaky behaviour. I know it will be hard for him to come off it again but I would like him to try!

[danman83]

I was bad on weed shelly for a bout 5 years as a teenager. I made my mum n dads life hell. It made me really angry all the time.

But then my life just flew by.. getting stoned all the time, just makes you not wanting to do anything all. Even tho i had great times. I regret doing it.

Any ways.. i wanted to quit.. i never smoked.. just weed… the way i quit.. i was 18 and decided to go in the army.. knowing i had a drugs test 8 month away. This was my focus! And i got a calender, and ticked each day off at a time.

I got there in the end, but i failed a medical. And didnt join. But in a way, i think it was me deep down just wanting a way to quit.

Your bf needs to want to quit no matter what. If hes planning on leaving you for it.. pack his bags for him lol.

Or tell him to cut down.. say every other day.. then weekends.

Does he smoke just weed or cigs aswell

[shelly]

Aww thanks for sharing your experience of it, he smokes cigs as well. This is the problem he cannot see what it is doing to him and he doesn’t want to quit? I need to try and get through to him how bad it is and what it’s going to him any advice on how to do that?

[danman83]

Well my best mates sister who was 40, and a good friend died of lung cancer and it spread like wildfire.. from a diagnosis at xmas she died 3 month later this year. She smoked weed everyday, and had a pain in her side all the time. But smoked weed more to get rid of the pain. But that obv was the cancer..

You can give him as much advice as you want, my mums always truking people who have died in my face from coke, which i dont blame her, but its not just going to make me stop like that. If you new some1 died from drinking today, would you not drink again?

The main thing he really needs to want to stop himself. He might have to hit rock bottom and have enough of it. But just make him aware, you dont get motivated enough and do anything with your life, and you get real bad paranoia.

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