[justynn84]

Hello, I’m new to this page and hoping not to get judged. I am a young male and in the past had a problem popping pills and then taking MDMA, I lost everything my house my job my friends. I was homeless for 6 months before getting given a chance at a new job, 3 months I didn’t take anything but I started this job and the pills stared again along with the mdma and speed and cocaine. I lost that job also. Still on the streets at this time it was December 31st when I lost that job but I still had a lot of drugs on me and took 1.5g of mdma and 0.5 g of cocaine drank a bottle of rum and slit my wrists, i was discovered by someone in the local park as I attempted to hang myself. That was my last day I had called it. I started to get help after and got help until 3 months ago when cocaine became involved with me again, half a gram here half a gram there, to now a 3.5 on the weekend by myself when I’m at work during the week. I have a service I use but they don’t know of this recent actions. What do I do my fiancé saved my life this year and I stopped drugs as far as she’s aware to sort my life out and now look at me? I’m going to loose her and everything else what can I do to stop this?

[danman83]

Hiya mate. Im same as you with a cocaine problem. Im doing my best to stop. I cant stand the suicidal thoughts and depression on the come down, especially when i have kids

Id delete everyone out your phone to do with coke. And never see anyone again to do with coke. Youve been given a 2nd chance in my eyes, so you can make it work. Could you not tell your gf? She could help you?

Id get to as many meetings as you can and use the services you have.

You have been so close to ending it, and its the drugs that make you like that.

Then nxt day or a few days after the park incident, was you glad you was stopped or not?

If this is what its doing to you and you want to carry on. Id go to every meeting you can and get as much support as you can and dont be ashamed. Im here anytime u need talk to anyone.

But dont deal with anyone to do with drugs now. Dont even drink! And take up some new hobbies. Listen to some cocaine recovery stories on you tube or podcast, they help me a lot.

[justynn84]

Hi mate, I’m glad I had someone reply on here was worried no one would, I have gone through a lot over the last couple of years, cane out of a 7 year relationship childhood lovers, had 3 children, 1 who was sadly taken from us so early and 2 I no longer see I am fighting for them but Its just circles currently, my current partner I haven’t been with long but it feels like forever. Before we got together I had a end of life deadline. I had no job I had no house no friends. I brought 2g of mdma to take all at once on the 26th april this year. I was trying everything to get jobs get everything, she gave me a job and let me come and stay with her until I sorted myself, again we wasn’t together at this time we was just seeing each other as mates there was feelings but none thrown on the table, I told her that I was gonna end it all in 2 days as that’s my deadline to everything. She cried and cried because I came into her life and made her happy that’s when I realised that I was given a 2nd chance at life, to live and love again have feelings for someone, I can’t tell her I’m so scared she will leave me I’ve hid it for so long, my main drug and alcohol worker who I’ve worked with for the whole of this year leaves the company next week so my details will be transferred to another worker which I’m happy about but scared to admit this problem also. If I hadn’t of met my current girlfriend I would love to of not be stopped in the park that day. But I value everything in my life now, my job my home my girlfriend everything

[danman83]

Sorry to hear about your child. No parent should go through that.

Right… so when are you buying the coke? What days? How much? How often?

Are you drinking everyday?

Have you deleted all your dealers nums and mates to do with coke?

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