[andyt]

Hi and thanks for adding me to Adfam.

I’ve been in a relationship with my partner for over two years and she’s always”liked a drink”.

There has been times when she’s drunk to excess, but the problems have recently got worse.

Business and money has always been high on the stress level for us both.

Anyway

I’ve noticed her drinking has changed over the last year or so. As soon has she’s drank more than half a bottle of wine she changes. I can almost physically feel her mood change. I’ve started going to bed etc to avoid her while drinking. 3 weeks ago she went out drinking, I went to bed in the spare room. She came home and all hell let loose. She woke me being aggressive and wouldn’t leave me alone. It ended up me calling the police after she attacked me. I refused to press charges.

We spoke the next day and she said she drank too

Forget

Help her sleep

She also said she knows her mood changes when she’s drank.

Shes said she will get help but she still can’t see the drink is a problem. It’s affected our relationship and buisness. Am I asking to much trying her to seek help

[ad1]

Hey Andy,

I used to be the same on drink…especially wine. It took me many years and embarrassing/dangerous situations to slow down.

I work in the city in a very demanding role an excellent job but up until about 3 years ago I fucked up loads on corporate events.

I understand your girlfriends excuse / reason and it’s probably true on her part! But honestly she needs to slow down or else something will happen.

My turning point was the day after a corporate event, it was a lovely night out fully paid in Farringdon…I woke up (late) the next morning to a close friend calling me, I had fell asleep and staff woke me up and I punched them in the face… I still to this day don’t remember a thing.

I too had the police called on a few occasions which was mortifying.

Another big wake up call was watching myself in videos and seeing how appalling I acted on wine,

I still drink but never mix drinks or have wine when out and I know people laugh but drinking water every other drink bloody works.

I hope this helps a bit, H x

[icarus-trust]

Hi Andy T

Thanks for sharing your story. I’m sorry that you are affected by your partner’s drinking. I know this is hard for you especially if she doesn’t feel that she has a problem.

If you would like to talk through what you are experiencing with someone who would understand what you are going through please contact us at The Icarus Trust. We are a charity that supports people affected by a partner’s addictive behaviours. We have trained and experienced people who would listen and maybe help you find a way forward.

You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrst.org

I hope this helps.

Good luck.

[andyt]

Thanks for the reply’s.

I think the big test will be when the counselling team re contact her. Unless she admits to the drink causing problems then I can’t see a way forward

[Author]

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