[karen]

My son has been smoking weed and doing coke for many years he stops and starts the coke

Bottom line is… I love him so much and it’s breaking my heart to see him destroy his life, it’s making me so so sad part of me wants to disconnect from him

But the guilt overwhelms me that if I do what if it kills him.

But at the same time this heart ache is killing me day in day out

Iv tried all the help groups and doctors etc with him, it works for a while but then he goes back to it.

Do I walk away after many years of this and live my life or do I carry on being so sad every day and not enjoying my life?.

I also have other grown children who need me to and I feel I devote my whole life to my son.

It’s driving me mad knowing what to do for the best.

Thoughts please if you take coke and have a mother who loves you dearly and does everything for you what would it mean to you if she walked away?

I feel for him as he know how hard he battles with it and how much he hates his lifestyle

And he’s the addict not me, although he says it’s just a bad habit and he’s not an addict.

[danman83]

Im the same.as your son and i am doing my best to quit coke. Im 36 and have 4 kids and im still with my gf and i have a good job. Im lapsing once a month, i sort of have it under control now. Were im just using once a month. I cant stand the stuff anymore, its a horrible manipulative drug, its like having the devil on your shoulder.

And he is an addict. You dont have to use everyday to be an addict. If you use for 6 month, even if its once a month you become an addict.

The 1st time you have coke you basically plant a seed in your brain… the more you have the seed grows and grows, and becomes a tree, pushing all your confidence and your normal self out the way.. to stop the coke, you need to stop watering the tree ( having more coke). If you watch louise clarke on you tube on crack cocaine part 123 she explains it in great detail and helps alot.

My rock bottom was that i was crying my eyes out coming down off coke feeling suicidal and depressed (this is a major side effect of coke) and i text my mum telling her everything, i was ashamed at 1st but she texts me all the time checking on me and ask if im still doing ok.

I dont know your full situation, but i guess your life still can go on, just keep checking on him. But the main thing is he must want to quit himself! Otherwise nothing will work.

If he wants to quit… he needs to not drink alcohol. This is a big trigger to get coke.

He needs to delete all dealers numbers out his phone, friends who take it, family who take it.

Delete all social media, ive been off fb for 6 week now and feel better.

And he needs to replace his usual routine of drugs and whatever his daily life is, and swap it for new ones. Im doing more sessions in the gym, ive took up reading. Im decorating again this week. Im thinking of teaching myself how to do tiling.

He needs replace the old routine with a new one.

Does he want to quit?

Feel free to ask me anything.

[adam]

Hi have you quit now

[danman83]

I forgot to say i had hynotherapy last week to help me stop for good, it was £85 for a 2 hour session and all i need is one.

But only time will tell,ive not had out since but its normally the 4th week i do.

[karen]

Thank you so much this really helps me understand a lot more

Take care your doing brilliant.

[karen]

Good to hear

my son has got worse things are not good he now thinks he has bugs under his skin and can see them but there is nothing there

He’s changed so much after the last two weeks and won’t get help.

I’m so tired and down with it all it breaks my heart

But pleased for you well done.

[huddle]

Hi Karen, so sorry to hear about your son and the torment his addiction is causing you. My son is 39 and has a serious weed & crack problem and mental health issues. Read what Danman83 says. He is very wise and his words have helped me enormously. The addiction is my son’s not mine. As much as I love my son I must look after myself, my health and my welfare. As desperately hard as it is my son has to make the choices in his life. I wish you all the best. Stay strong. X

[danman83]

Thanks.

[danman83]

Whats making him say he has bugs under his skin? Is he on coke when he is saying this??

[karen]

I think it’s when he’s done coke as I can’t see any bugs on him it’s moles on his skin he been taking so much coke I think as this is what happened before

I have not spoken to him for a few days which is not like me

But I just can’t take it any more

He has no hope of changing at the moment

He says the bugs are making him loose weight but it’s not it’s the cocaine

[chase666]

Can you encourage him to see a GP? It sounds like he could be possible suffering mental health issues, the bugs crawling isn’t a side effect of coke as far as I’m aware.

He needs to want to change though, you can’t make that decision for him as much as you want to try. I’m addicted to codeine and trying to taper off, as much as I love my girlfriend, her saying that she wanted me to stop taking had no bearing until I wanted to.

The most you can do is not enable any of his behaviour, if he asks for money ensure that it’s being spent on food etc, don’t give him money as it will most likely go on drugs.

Good luck, I hope he gets the help he needs

[danman83]

The only thing i can think of, and ive seen this happen in the past with mates. Cocaine and amphetimines make you stay away, if your taking alot, you can be up for days! And this causes hallucinations really bad. Ive seen friends go home and unscrew everything electrical in there house, thinking C.I.D or watching them. Pulling wires off the wall. One lad i know was naked in a back yard of someone, because he thought the police have bugged his clothes.

So i think, but i could be wrong he just needs a lot of rest and come off the coke and everything else.

My mate who was addicted to wiz. Is now in a mental home, it was sad seeing him deteriate. But all this was started from no sleep and the drugs.

[Author]

Posts