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Never thought I’d be posting how I feel about my siblings on a website but I have a feeling people around me are getting sick of me complaining about how I miss them. I’m the oldest child my mom has but my dad has 5 other older children (3 girls 2 boys) and I grew up close with all of them when I was a baby and kid but they are all about 5 years older then me atleast. Anyways now I’m 17 and all my siblings are either alcoholics, drug abusers or in jail. And it just really sucks because I remmeber them how they use to be and now it’s like I don’t know who they are anymore. I’m closest with my sister Laura who is in jail, she calls me everyday and those calls seriously make my whole day. My other sister is. meth head & the other one is an alcoholic who gets spoiled from her grandparents she’s like a big kid. My brother is aways in and out of jail I don’t remember the last time he stayed out of jail for more then a month. And my other brother recently went to jail for selling drugs. Even tho this is who they are today I just keep remembering them when we were all close & no one hated each other and it sucks because I know it’ll never be like that again. I just hope I don’t end up like them. This shitty feeling is coming more frequently and I know it shouldn’t bother me but it does. I don’t like telling friends about them because it is pretty embarrassing & I feel annoying when I keep bringing them up. Idk maybe no one will even read this but idc it feels kinda good typing out my thoughts. So if someone does read my boring story thank u. 🙂
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Your story is far from boring……I think you are a remarkable sibling who loves them no matter what addiction they have….You obviously miss the people they were..and thats ok, cause you had that bond with them…They are very lucky they have someone who loves them like you…..and you wont end up like them…..live your life and enjoy the partnerships you meet along the way…..xxhugs xx
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Hi Hunni….your words move me to tears…..it’s so hard trying to keep things going when you live with an addict……only you can know what to do, and having support really does lighten that worry….your children I’m guessing are still too young to know what’s going on, but they won’t be for ever….think of the impact his addiction will have on them…….I hope against hope that you come to the right decision for you and your kids…in the meantime try and find some support from a group in your area. I have found the regulars on here a wealth of help….which in turn has made me so much stronger..take care Hunni xxx
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Urgh, enough with these stupid posts
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He is functioning, working and paying the bills, then you describe him as a sneaky lying heroine addict, so if you take the heroine out of it, he’s doing ok?
Stay focused on his positives and just because he is a heroin addict don’t assume he has become a bad person. He no more wants to be an addict than you want him to be.
Society has made us look at a drug addict as you described him, so they aren’t just regretting the day they even tried it they are fighting society’s perception of them.
If he was addicted to a gp prescribed drug he wouldn’t be condemned in the same way.
Try educate him on the impact it will have on you all, including him. I do not believe he enjoys the path he is on, but the power of the drug gives him a false sense of reality.
Seek supports for you and your children and encourage him to do the same. Don’t hate him, it’s the drug that has taken him. He does have choices but it’s no longer clear cut, it’s a journey and I prey he engages with appropriate supports.
My thoughts and prayers are with you, him and your children, keep strong and focused x -
To cant take no more & cazandyx… thanks for your comments. It makes so much sense. Our children are 8 & 12. I asked my 12 yr old “what do you think about drugs?” He said “its not good its stupid”. I left it at that, I thought if he knew about his dad that would of prompted him to say something. My partner is on methadone thats what annoys me, he uses on top. Plus it seems all the users he knows know not to tell me so it feels like they think im stupid. I know hes not a bad person & he actually says that. Hes just gota problem. We’ve had 100s of chats about it. I support him but I get frustrated cause he has gone 8 weeks with out heroin he says he “dabbles” he cant help it. Its a secret to his work & non using friends. He works nights so he looks tired alot of the time & he uses that to his advantage. I suppose knowing he takes heroin but i dont see him use I imagine allsorts. I dont want that phone call either. Ive said if he dies through anything heroin related I wont go to his funeral cause it was self inflicted selfishness.
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Hi fbc83,
The Icarus Trust has a free “Family Friend” service which is giving you someone to talk to, let everything out and then signpost you to additional help if you want. They are people who have been in situations with addictions in their families, so are able to relate on one level of another.
You can contact them via email info@icarustrust.org or have a look at their website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck!
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You should not worry about putting your feelings down on paper or on a website, it really helps to express your thoughts. In so many case there is loads of support for the people with the addictions but what about those close to them. The Icarus Trust is a charity focused on supporting those close to others with addictions. We have a team of Family Friends who will never mind if you contact them and can help find you the best way forward. Take a look at our website, http://www.icarustrust.org, use the contact page and register.
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The reciept was dor the 28th which was Tuesday!
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I hear your pain, it’s a heart wrenching journey you are on and as much as you may not like hearing this, but so is he. I genuinely don’t believe anyone by choice choses a life of an addict. The drug consumes their whole life, choices they would never contemplate if they weren’t drug addicts.
He no doubt that still adores you and would if he had one wish never have taken the drug. It’s the drug you hate not him.
I recently lost my brother to it, so I can empathise with how you are feeling. I just prey that he can find the strength to beat it, but it’s the hardest fight for life I have ever witnessed.
Seek help for yourself through adfam or drugfam, both offer invaluable support to families.
You must look after yourself, and believe him when he says how hard it is. It goes against everything they have grown up believing, he has to lie, who would accept their last penny being spent but his desire to have the drug takes him into a false reality. It’s a wicked wicked addiction.
Be strong, stay focused, seek supports for yourself, hate the drug not him and believe that if he had one wish he would likely say he wishes he never tried it.. -
Hi Desperado!
For a situation of this level, you need to speak to people who have had a similar experience, who can relate to you in one form or another. The Icarus Trust is an charity which provides a free Family Friend, who is someone for you to speak to. And then there is a signposting service to help you find the best help for you, your family and your situation. Please get in touch with them on info@icarustrust.org or go to their website http://www.icarustrust.org. They can make all the difference!
Best of luck!
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