[inlove1989]

I don’t want to go on and on so that it becomes a long post. I am 15 months into a connection with an ex drinker. He’s never drank In the time I’ve known him. He isn’t a part of any sort of group etc. He’s usually working full time and has done alot to turn his life around.

I have fallen so in love with him. He’s got alot of wonderful parts and he’s like any other human. It’s just he has extreme mood changes.

He’s currently got alot on. He’s loosing his home due to landlords selling. 4 months ago he had to stop working due to depression and his back flared up. He has extreme pain at the moment and is awaiting help. He’s gone from a good salary a month to living of a few hundred. I’m bailing him out so he can eat etc. He does give me most his money back but I’m letting him off alot too.

Our relationship has never been normal. Due to his problems we’ve not been on a single day out since we officially got together in July. He can’t afford a car either so I’m paying out for taxis and doing all the chasing.

His moods are so high and low. He’s spoken to me in disgusting tones in the past but he’s definitely improving. He doesn’t want to loose me but when he is feeling attacked or questioned he shuts down and blames me for everything.

He has a very weird connection with his ex from 3 years ago. Their split clearly wrecked him and they have ended up as “friends” but it doesn’t add up. She’s caused alot of friction between us and he’s never done the most obvious things to put my mind at ease. She’s not had a nice word to say about me but he still chats to her in texts and mentions her to me too much. I don’t think his hearts healed from her but he insists they are friends and he gets fed up me doubting it.

Tonight after months of me paying for everything and sorting all his problems out he’s had a snap. I’ve asked him a few questions today about where he’s at with us and the future. It feels like we’ve hit a wall and he needs to work out what he’s going to do to improve. I’ve been honest and said do you see us getting to do normal Things anytime soon? He said I’ve been digging all day and it’s doing his head in. He’s told me not to message him anymore. I expressed I was starting to feel I can’t make him happy as he keeps saying he’s never argued with another woman like me. But we don’t argue. He gets mad and blows and I have never talked to him in a horrible tone. I think it’s because he’s now sober and hasn’t learned to deal with emotions.

I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I love him so much and I got want to give him up, but I’m scared he can’t offer me or my kids a future.

He said he will talk to me tomorrow after I said I don’t want you to force this relationship based on the money side of things. I worry that I’m just a safety net now. He is terrified of loosing me but he said tonight if I keep going on I’ll wreck us and we will be over .

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