[sbernato]

Hi. My husband of 5 yrs admitted to me yesterday that he’s addicted to cocaine. We’ve been having marriage issues for 2 months now. Times he don’t come home after work. Says he’s at his friends house and can’t drive because he’s drunk. I’ve actually gone to the friends house one night and found him to be sober. Weekly paychecks are getting smaller and rent is overdue. He says his hours haven’t been good. He lays asphalt. And comes home late because he had to drive coworker home and spent time there. He had $5000 in savings and that’s gone. He couldn’t explain what he spent it on. Now I know. I feel disappointed disrespected and unloved. He spends more time with his friend coworker and his wife. As I now know they all do cocaine and smoke pot. He says it’s not that bad. I came

Home today after visiting with my dad, he usually goes with me but said he was tired. Hoping to have a nice bar b q and fun time with him but instead he’s preparing the ribs and I can hear him pulling his nose constantly. I said to

Him “ good shit huh?” No reply. I can’t leave him as I cannot afford to live on my paycheck. I have nowhere to go. I want out. He cares more about his drugs than me and that hurts me so bad. I told him this. He said nothing in response. So my question is. How do I live with this knowing he won’t stop. How do I build myself up to not argue with him and accept to live with this.

[redfox20]

Hi Susan, I don’t think it’s something that you can accept to leave with in my honest opinion the lies the disappearing acts will eat away at you over time. I have 3 children with my partner and I’m not accepting it he’s currently not living here and won’t be until he’s clean and bills up to date we tried to live together early this year after separating last year but I mentally couldn’t take any more and he’s back at he’s mums. I think it depends on how far you’re into the situation you’ve only discovered it so you may be prepared to put up with more in a sense. I wouldn’t encourage any drinking or do it with him as this gives them the perfect excuse maybe think about boundaries around you in the home etc the more difficult it is to do it the more they will think twice or may see it’s a bigger problem than they first realised. Hope this helps and I wish you all the best any questions feel free to ask ????

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