- This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 11 months ago by eddie123.
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September 6, 2022 at 5:10 pm #7677tireddad19Participant
Married 22 years, two kids, one 15 the other 17. High School sweethearts.
Wife is functional Alcoholic, binge drinker.
Both children diagnosed Major Depression.
Wife 2 DUI convictions.
Our friend group drinks a fair amount when socializing and activities usually involve alcohol.
Wife has sought some help for alcoholism, but doesn’t want to completely quit drinking out of fear of losing friend group, etc. Says she can limit it.
Not working. She binges at night, etc. gets totally wasted, verbally abuses me and kids. We are all embarrassed by her behavior. She stays up until early morning hours and I am forced to remain awake as well to make sure kids are protected to protect her from herself, and our house. She gets into tub and passes out. Has overflowed the tub and flooded the house a couple of times.
This affects my health and my job. I am constantly tired at work and cannot perform to the best of my ability. I am making more and more mistakes at work because of this. She works from home and can sleep in and periodically answer emails and nobody is the wiser. She doesn’t technically get hangovers, just tired and sleeps when she wants.
She convinces herself that she contributes around home, but in reality, does the bare minimum.
She is constantly looking for a way to get away with doing the bare minimum or take the easiest way out.
That behavior I feel has transferred to the kids and is very frustrating.
I have tried to tell her we would be better apart, that the kids mental health would be better, and she would be happier without me which might mean that she could recover and not want to self medicate with alcohol.
She doesn’t see it that way.
She is so co-dependent and will not do anything on her own, nothing!
She then threatens to tell people my secrets and demons if I go through with leaving her or making her leave.
There is way more to the story and will add to it as I have time to update this.
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September 7, 2022 at 12:58 pm #30896vivviefParticipant
Sorry to hear of your problems, keep going with your story, we are here because we have all experienced in different ways life with an addict in the family, and probably have more understanding than most of the things that you are facing
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September 8, 2022 at 11:02 pm #30922eddie123Participant
Hi there, this sounds like a very difficult situation for you and I am sorry. I know of a great charity that supports people like yourselves nationwide. The family support programme is all remote and they help many families a year. Please see link and fill in the referral and someone will endeavour to respond within 24 hours. https://adaptoxford.org.uk/the-icarus-programme/
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