[ninzforever]

My partner of 7 years as been struggling to come off cocain for over a year, he started using after a 2 year battle though court to get our 3 god children out of care due to there mother using drugs and neglect we lost this fight and they was put up for adoption, I know it’s for the best for them , he went of a down hill struggle not coping with the loss he cheated on me and destroyed my whole world in to pieces, he beg me to forgive him with h I did and I’ve been trying to get him of the drugs since, and I’m now at the point of what is real and not he takes it daily , and I’m the one to blame cos he says he needs it to come home to me as I’m boring , he gonna cheat on me he regrets coming home and a lot more vile things then when he comes of I go through the rattling stage of abuse name calling and he’ll tell me how sorry he is and how great full he is I’ve stood by him and all the amazing things a man should say and we are happy at this time then he relapse and hits the drugs again and he all starts bk over again I’m at the point I don’t know what’s real anymore I’ve screamed I’ve shouted I’ve sober I’ve ran but nothing gets into him everything is about him and how he feels my feelings and strength is never took into account I’m falling and lost and broken and I’m almost ready to walk forever my love for him is real but at the same time I’m resenting him

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