- This topic has 4 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 6 months ago by riversidedjj20.
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June 25, 2020 at 11:51 pm #5954riversidedjj20Participant
Hi all, very new to this and looking for guidence or a level, I want to know if I’m over reacting to how much my wife drinks, as in is it me that’s the problem?
Here is what a good week looks like,
Friday, 6 large beers, bottle of wine, couple of gins
Saturday 12-15 bottles of beer
Sunday 6-10 beers.
A bad week will be similar but start on a Wednesday and go until Sunday.
My wife never gets hangovers, or I’ll the next day,
I get upset because her main priority is to drink, and says I’m always bagging, but it’s been getting me down for years 4 to be precise.
I’ve tried talking to her but she dismisses anything I say about her drinking.
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Thanks
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June 26, 2020 at 11:10 am #17498bt1978Participant
Hey Mate
From a health perspective that is a great deal to be consuming, sooner or later it will take its toll especially as you stated that is a good week.
We tend to get hung up on the amount, or how long the binge is – but really it’s the impact its having on the person and the people around them, and from what you have written it sounds like its impacting your relationship significantly – and that is a problem.
The fact your concerns are being dismissed isn’t good as where do you go from there?
Do you think she sees it as a problem at all?
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June 28, 2020 at 9:46 pm #17541riversidedjj20Participant
Thanks for replying, I’m glad you see where I’m coming from, I don’t think she does think it’s a problem or that it is affecting our marriage, managed a dry day yesterday, then tonight from between 4.00, till 9 she had 3 beers, 3/4 bottle of red then 5 large gins…. Now in bed in a bit of a mood, I knew this would happen as yesterday with her having no drink, she was very irritable, thanks for your help.
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June 26, 2020 at 11:12 am #17499ash2013Participant
Hi there,
I dont have much experience in the alcohol situation, but if it bothers you then it is a problem. In marriage you have to compromise, you may not like what the other person has to say, but if its a problem for them, then its a problem.
It does look quite excessive, looks like 60-70 units a week, and the recommended guidance is a maximum of 14.
I’d be on the floor after any of those days!
Dismissing is just a deflection, chances are that she knows it is a problem, but doesnt want to stop, or admit it to you.
Some others on here may have some advice, sorry that I don’t personally. Keep smiling, and stay positive.
Best wishes 🙂
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June 28, 2020 at 9:50 pm #17542riversidedjj20Participant
Hi thanks for replying, I worked it out between 40-60 per week but yeah alot, if I bring this up she just gets mad, couple of weeks ago she had alot of gin on a Fri night, to the point of her being sick before bed, at 4 am I was getting up for work and she got up to see to the dog, there was a big bang and crash, she had fainted, my immidiete reaction was drinking too much, but she got angry at this was even brought up, she was lucky as she fell into a table bursting her nose, I fear this is just the start of the downhill
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