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I have all those problems and all those same feelings too. I have been married to 30 years to a functional alcoholic. It doesn’t get any easier tho I have some coping mechanisms such as gym, friendships and get away for breaks. I did almost leave but have a now older child to consider and didn’t want to rock his world. He did actually get the drinking under control for 4 happy years but then came Covid……Personally I would be considering my options.
Sorry to read your post. I am in a similar position but much further down the line. Married to a functional Alcoholic for 30 years. This has become more of problem as the years went by and as our only child grew older he started to become more aware of this situation so this is something you have to consider too. Because it causes us no work/financial problems it’s really hard to address. Eventually I decided to leave and that did bring around a whole conversation and realisation that wasn’t there before and we did get it under control but unfortunately Covid has taken things right back to where they were. I hope you find your way thro this.