Hi Alison
This is my first ever response or post. I was surfing the web looking for any help I could get with my son & now possibly my daughter!.
I have been going threw tough times too since with my son since he was 15, his now 20.
I have a little understanding where you are coming from, the only thing I can say to you is listen to your instincts. You are not mad, or just distrusting; as parents we have that special connection, gut feelings.
Maybe, try & include yourself a little more into his life or are you scared on knowing?
x