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If your living situation is unlivable contact your council, get rehoused and explain the situation. You get on with your own life which will force your mum to stop enabling and actually get help for herself. The council have a legal obligation as you are living in a dangerous environment. Good luck xx
A story of hope- although I wasn’t as self destructive as your brother but I became reliant on drinking 2 bottles of wine every night after I was sexually assaulted. I couldn’t wait to get home and drink on my own and hid it from my friends and family. It wasted so much money, I was worried about my health and I knew in my heart that one bottle would turn to two and two to three etc. I really wanted to stop but I was always one of those ‘this is the last bottle I’ll drink, I’ll quit tomorrow kind of person’. I never harmed anyone and wasn’t an angry drunk but I turned into an anxious wreck, waking up every morning feeling so anxious and sick. I really believed that this was it and all I had to look forward to was a downward spiral. After I particularly tearful breakdown when my partner found a bottle hidden under my bed he told me to go to an NA meeting. I was so skeptical and never believed it would work. All I was hopeful for was maybe I would be able to cut down, I never thought I’d fully recover. I went to my first meeting with a hoodie over my head and face so no one could see me. I cried through the whole thing. I don’t believe in God and I thought the whole thing was a waste of time. But meeting other addicts had a subliminal effect on me. I started cutting down. Only drinking 3/4 of a bottle a night, then half. It was so difficult not to get up in the night and finish what I had but I began to feel proud of myself when I woke up and found nearly half a bottle left. I had days when I’d slip up and drink too much again and then I’d go back to that awful feeling of anxiety, nausea and fear. But I perservered. Eventually came the day I decided not to pick up a bottle of wine. I was nearly crawling the walls and I left the house several times to go to the shop to buy wine, only to force myself to turn back. I started to realise how amazing I felt in the morning compared to when I was drinking. Again, I had a few relapses. But they became further and further apart. It was depressing at first and so, so hard to have the discipline not to just pop in and buy a bottle but I just remembered the hangovers and misery. I am now over 90 days clean and sober. I should add that I was diagnosed with PTSD and I have a prescription for clonazepam, as well as trauma based therapy. But I haven’t felt this happy or well for years. It can be done. Get him to a meeting. Draw bottom lines unless he goes. Now I go to three meetings a week, sometimes in person and sometimes online and have made some amazing friends. I know my story is different from yours but any alcoholic can get sober. The person needs to want it. Putting emotional guilt on someone will only drive them further into addiction. They need to hear that you want to help and support them but also stick to your bottom lines. NA isn’t an overnight cure but I was so skeptical about it and now I look forward to meetings. Good luck and I hope you find a solution.