[asdf]

Thank you for your message. It has helped a lot. I will talk to my teenagers. He’s not their dad so no legal issues to worry about. I doubt he would have contact after we split! Mine have been through so much already that this is going to be hard but the madness of isolation and lock down means I have more time to help them through than I’m ever likely to again. I feel like I have to take this opportunity. I hope my partner can recover, but it is clear that he won’t do it yet and he is doing more harm than good being with me now. I have tried everything I can to help and nothing is helping because he isn’t ready. It is heartbreaking but I know there’s no more I can do.

[asdf]

I have decided to talk to my two. I’m working from home but have the Easter holidays off as annual leave so I will talk to them then. That gives me time to make sure they’re ok and I can answer any questions and have space to get over it myself before having to work.

With your little one, I honestly wouldn’t leave him alone with him. I know it is hard but he’s not safe. Even if he accidentally got hold of something…you would never forgive yourself. My partner thinks he’s got it all together but there’s no way he can after using. He’s left things lying around and I’ve found residue in the bathroom etc. it wouldn’t take much for an inquisitive 2 year old. And you don’t want him to see that and think it’s normal.

You are strong. You will get through this and life will be so much better ❤️

[asdf]

Thank you for your reply. It sounds like we are in a really similar situation. We have been to all the services who will help us and done all the counselling. He just tried to rush through everything and never really digs deep enough to make a difference. As soon as services stopped due to corona, he was back on it. I just can’t deal with the anxiety, never mind the ridiculous amount of money. He won’t be staying here once I have figured out why to tell the kids.

I hope you are keeping strong. I have lived with an ex before and it is so draining.

[asdf]

I am in a really similar position. It is so hard. But it is not your responsibility to keep him alive/off the streets. If you don’t want to or can’t go on in this relationship, and that happens, it won’t be your fault. It will be his doing. It took me a long time to learnt that this is his responsibility but I still catch myself trying not to set him off or catch him out. Then I have to stop and tell myself that he will do what he wants to do no matter what I do so there’s no point in me getting stressed about it. It helps to a certain extent. I don’t cry and shout and get very stressed but I can’t sleep, hence writing this at 1:43am! I don’t know what the solution is but for now, work on putting responsibility back on him x

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