Hi Lore, you have to learn to make it wether he does or not!. He is addicted to drugs and he is also a sex addict. Unfortunately the two go hand in hand. Im sure he is a good person deep down but the addiction has over taken him and he is selfish and self centred to the core of his being. You are caught up in a vicious circle of emotional, mental and physical trauma and abuse. BUT you can break the cycle of abuse. I know because I lived in this kind of relationship. I found help and support with alanon (meetings for friends and families of alcoholics) I separated from my husband when our daughter was 5 months old. It was hard but I have a lovely life now and my husband is sober a long time. I will pray for you! go to a meeting get help and support. I don’t know you but you were not taken into this world to be abused and neither was your little baby. God bless