[confused23]

Hi LoveB4Drugs

i appreciate the reply and it was helpful. My husband has now been gone since Friday out running around and doing god knows what. He left me here high and dry knowing rent was due etc and I have no way to pay it considering he was the main person that made the money. I have no one here for any help and I have checked in with all resources and there’s nothing. I can’t be homeless with 4 children. How does someone do this to their family?? This isn’t my first rodeo with him either it just keeps going on and on. Like when does it stop? I have tried so hard and I’m the end I’m the bad guy. He has his own friends believing it’s me and all my fault. His sober friends that aren’t even using things believe him and talk crap to me etc saying I always have to have tabs on him and controlling him etc. because we have the life 360 app. Like how is someone suppose to trust anyone that has lost the trust if they don’t know what they are doing cause they have lied so much about their where about? I’m in my bed and just so fucked up and confused and don’t know how I’m going to do this consider he left me with everything and I have no help. Going through this makes me feel as I have failed as a wife even though I know I haven’t. I do good by him and try so hard for him but it’s never enough. What gives? I’m so heart broken and my mental health also is down the drain.

[confused23]

Yes it’s very normal for someone on coke to lie and it only gets worse as time goes by and the more they do. My husband as jumped from meth, to coke and aderall and now he’s doing Kratom. I’m at a loss anymore to be honest I have done everything I can in my power to help him. He come home last night and I could tell he was on something and I said something and it was I swear to god I’m not on anything and I’m tired of being accused and u not trusting me blah blah and eventually he admitted to it once there was no sleeping going on last night. I’m starting to learn u just have to do what’s best for u cause at the end of the day u can only do so much and they will do whatever they want regardless

[confused23]

Hello bellapop

thanks for the reply! And tonight I finally had to call the cops! He tore up my stuff and threw all of my clothes off the balcony and tried to make me leave with four kids when it’s so much easier for him to do so all cause I walked away from him trying to argue with me. Everything is my fault and I’m being called whore  and a bitch etc and after the police were done here my 15 year old daughter cried to him and begged him to see what he’s doing. He grabbed beers he had bought a while back and didn’t really seem to care what she had to say and blamed me and walked out! I’m scared to know what it’s gonna be like when he comes back considering everything. I just don’t know anymore I have done everything I can to help him. I am all the way in Texas away from my family and have no one here at all. I’m so lost and heart broken and just sick to my stomach.

[confused23]

Hello All,

this is my second post with a week or so haven’t gotten a reply back from the first one. I’m hurting so bad my husband was doing well sober for 3-4 months and then the past two days I have been questioning his appearance and how he’s been gas lighting me etc. and of course says I’m not high….well last night while we were in bed and he kept accusing me of messing around all while I was laying right next to him and he pushed me in the back and I lashed back and told him don’t touch me or put his hands on me. All night he was just talking crap, seeing and hearing things and accusing me of stuff etc. well today I find out he did aderall. I told him I can’t do it anymore and he’s says that I’m not going to leave he won’t let me etc. idk how much stronger I can be at this point I’m so tired like I have nothing left. He use to use meth and coke pretty bad and destroy things and mentally and emotionally and sometimes physically abuse me. I just don’t know anymore. I have offered to go with him and I showed him the celebrate recovery program that’s close by and he told me he was going to start but have yet to see it. Idk what gives! I have no one here where I live. All of my family are in Oklahoma. I thought about going to stay at the 30 day emergency shelter with my kids just to save enough to find a income based apartment so I don’t have to uproot them considering they are starting school tomorrow and they love their friends and school. Idk what to do anymore I feel like I’m losing myself in all the chaos

[confused23]

I just caught my husband red handed! I’m so frustrated he’s still lying! He makes me feel like such an awful person when he’s doing wrong….when does it end? How long does it take.. He talks as if it’s so easy to just give it all up but yet he’s still doing it. He’s already lost his job etc. idk what to do. I’m looking for a job so I can do what’s needs for my kids. The mental and emotional stuff this shit does to me is so exhausting. I’m trying so hard and I have been very understanding and trying to help him but yet he still hides it and is still lying. What give??? I have no one to talk to and getting to the point I’m just frustrated at this point

[confused23]

I sat down and talked with him calmly and tried to understand from his side and let him know the at I was here for him but idk if that even means anything to him really right now. He has been doing better but has been avoiding going to celebrate recovery like he agreed to do and said he needed. It’s like no matter how much I’m here for him I’m still the enemy and the outsider and idk what to do anymore I’m lost and just at the point where I want to give up cause I have been doing it over and over. I dealt with addiction with my brother for 12 years and now I’m doing it with my husband and I’m just tired. I have no one I can talk to just myself and I have my own mental issues from my situation now and my last relationship of 13 years that was full of abuse. What do I do? How do I deal with it.

[confused23]

This is where I’m at with my husband same thing as you are with yours! He’s played me to think he’s sober over the past few weeks when I’m reality he’s been using and I caught him yesterday. I’m so hurt and torn and I tried the whole boundaries thing and he doesn’t respect those or go by them I’m lost and don’t know what else to do at this point.

[confused23]

I have known my husband since we were young and we dated in middle school and were very close until he had to move away and then we had lost touch. Well after that I needed up with someone for 13 years and very abusive I finally left that and was able to get out of it. Then I reconnected with my husband now and started talking again etc. we have been married almost 3 years. We I had gotten with him he was sober and a recovering addict from meth then it went from that to back to using meth and cocaine. Well he stopped all of it and the last year or so he’s been having a hard time staying away. I left him in July of last year and went back home to my family cause he was using cocaine pretty bad well he cleaned up and I came back in oct of last year and it started all over again and I actually caught him in the act. Now he has stopped again I do drug tests etc so just trying to take it day by day! But I’m going through stuff with my brother being in the hospital very Sick due to drugs also so my anxiety just goes crazy etc. I love my husband so very much but to him I stay on his ass but I’m not just trying to help him

[confused23]

Hi Debbie,

I’m nervous and scared to have serious conversations with my husband also! As soon as I tell him I would like to talk stuff instantly starts hitting the fan! He always says I’m just nagging etc. I dont understand why he tries to hide that he’s using cocaine when it’s so obvious and I know he’s high as soon as I see his face. He has gotten destructive a couple of times. He’s very manipulative and a narcissist extremely! Everything is always my fault. He makes me the reason of his using just like on Christmas Eve we went to the gas station to get him some cigarettes I walked in and got them and walked out and once he seen me he hurried and hid something and he was super nervous so I asked him “what do u have” and he said nothing then I looked between his legs on the seat and there was white powder stuff on my seat so I said asked again and he still denied it. Then I proceeded to pull out of my parking spot and noticed a bag on the ground outside of his door so I stopped and got out and got it and sure enough it was a bag quarter full of cocaine! He still then denied it and said well if it’s mine then give it to me and I set there and poured it all out! Then he got sooooo angry like so angry and blamed me for it cause we had a disagreement earlier that day but we were fine after we had talked so he yelled and screamed etc and made me feel like the lowest person in the world

[confused23]

Hi

My husband is an addict but he claims he’s clean his normal drug of choice is meth but he also enjoys cocaine. I have a gut feeling he’s been using cocaine here and there but I can never catch it and he never leaves evidence idk what to do. About 3-4 months ago I left due to his drug use and lying I came back 3 months later cause he agreed to all these things and even agreed to drug test to show me he’s staying clean etc but now all that stuff is out the window and he won’t drug test now that I’m back. He constantly has a runny nose and the sniffles, sometimes he does like as if he is high, he gets spurts of high energy, he has mood swings and at times his sleep is very disrupted. I have severe trust issues due to my past relationship and now that he’s also lied to me so much I have an entire story of things but at this point I’m lost and don’t know what to do

[Author]

Posts