[danman83]

Hey, really sorry for the late comment. Moving away really does not fix the problem your addiction stays with you. And you can get drugs and alcohol even in a little village. So moving doesn’t fix things.

Me personally if only move jobs unless people I work with have it on them at work all the time.

If he does decide to stay he needs to set boundaries and literally tell anyone who uses not to come round. But moving might do him good. It’s just hard to say it will work untill he settles in I guess.

It’s hard now summer is here. A few have relapsed from the meetings I know now.

[danman83]

I forgot which park I said… Which park did I say? Lol.

Thanks for your comment.

Why what is the advice u need anyway?

[danman83]

I’m a bit lost in how to answer the triggers and cravings.. I guess they are similar, when I crave it I guess I’m thinking about using.. And a trigger is where I drive past say a corner shop where I always meet my dealer., so if I drive past there when I am not meeting him.. This will be a trigger and I will remember getting coke from there and can trigger me in to buy coke. This is why we need to avoid triggers and people and places.

People can’t stop for there own kids, and this is the sad truth and what it does to people. I guess it is the addictive brain. Because if we was clean. Kids win everytime.

[danman83]

I’m glad he has gone on zoom he will meet some great people. I just went gorge walking in wales with some from my meeting and I arranged it. I never met most of them. And we had one of the best times ever.

Regarding the parking ticket and things like that. When u work the 12 step programme u have to live on honest life. I do not litter anymore. And I use to, help people who are struggling, even if it’s just with a shop door. Things like this. Give off positive things in life you feet positive back. And that genuinly works.

Doing small things like litter, causing arguments, road rage, all leads to negative things and has a roll on effect. I know it sounds to much. I feel so much better today.

Obviously we don’t do everything perfect but we do our best to live an honest life.

I hope he does stick to them. I go on the Salford ones if he ever wants them. What area are u in?

[danman83]

Glad your OK.

Ye your best waiting till he’s sober untill you talk to him.

What does he mean by upping his therapy?

[danman83]

Well it is ourselves telling us, we do say the voice in our head, but it is us at the end of the day. But I guess it’s the addictive side that wants it, it wants the drug and craves it. So your addictive brain will tell you things like.. Just one bag will be OK, you won’t get anymore, you will be back for 9pm, you won’t drink and drive. Ect… But at the end of the day’s its all lies. You will do more bags, you will drink and drive and so on.

It’s like having a devil and angel on each shoulder arguing with your self shall I get some.

I hope I answered that ok for you.

Feel free to ask me anything

[danman83]

Hey hope you are OK.

Ye it’s a vicious circle feeling guilty and depressed on a come down. Then we are back at it a few days later. How are u doing anyway?

[danman83]

It doesn’t matter what addiction it is. It just shows them other people’s mentality and are not very well. And clearly have no respect for anyone. You might come across people like this. Just blank them out and focus on your own recovery.

He needs to go to C. A there is no discrimination what so ever.

[danman83]

Hiya Lindy,

Good to hear your son is doing well. And you can tell he wants this. And that’s the main thing.

Thanks again. I’m feeling a lot better now.

[danman83]

Hiya sorry for the late reply.. 1st off he has to want to quit for him self. Not you wanting him and saying he needs to go to meetings. Or he won’t get better.

There are C A meetings on the website with times and days. Each day meetings are on. He needs to download zoom as well. As they are through zoom. And to just join a meeting. I’m from Bolton so I go on Salford or Manchester meetings. But it’s up to him.

Tell him to just to listen to people’s stories and if he wants to talk he can. And not to be worried about it all. Don t let the god aspect put him off tell him. Its about a higher power we believe in. People have there own dead parents as a higher power.

He then needs to get a sponsor and work the steps. I feel great now and if u put the effort in it really does work. I promise u that❤️????

I’m 50 days clean today.

Also tell him go to face to face meetings in your area. These help a great deal and its a must.

[danman83]

Me personally I would delete everyone you know who dabbles with coke. When u join ca you get contacts details, and ring them. When the urges happen. It gets rid of them. I never believed it. But it really does work.

[danman83]

Ye I fully understand you. I work the 12 steps in c a. And I have had my best clean time. It really does work. Phoning people each day helps in recovery so much. We learn about our resentments from are past that can cause us to use.

Most people I see, who have been to councilling say.. The councillors say go to AA or CA.

So you relapse every few year is this right? But how long does this relapsed last?

[danman83]

Ye I fully understand you. I work the 12 steps in c a. And I have had my best clean time. It really does work. Phoning people each day helps in recovery so much. We learn about our resentments from are past that can cause us to use.

Most people I see, who have been to councilling say.. The councillors say go to AA or CA.

So you relapse every few year is this right? But how long does this relapsed last?

[danman83]

Hey mate. 1st off your are doing brilliantly to get this long clean. Don’t beat your self up. It’s happened. Get back on track. No point thinking of it now. Think forward.

What things did you do to stay clean! Have u joined C A anonymous? And worked the 12 steps and have a sponsor? If not you ring your sponsor everyday. When u get cravings, actually the second you do. And they genuinely go away. Or jump on a meeting.

Am not to sure if do or don’t know this already.

Just keep doing what you was doing and phone people like u from the meetings. And go to meetings

[danman83]

Thanks for that. That is a main trigger payday for people. But it wasn’t for me. But if he’s back in the meetings he’s in the right place. It’s hard when your only young and that’s all you think about going to the pub ect… How will we cope. But there is a better life out there with out these things.

[Author]

Posts