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I can’t believe u asked if he was gay ???????????? that made me laugh.
Ye he definitely will do alone, especially on coke and when he’s ran out, that’s all there is, you and negative thoughts. It’s awful.
I’m doing great thanks. Doing my step 9 now, I have to apologise to people I’ve upset in the past. So I apologised to my mum today. Was quite emotional.
Just spoke in a meeting, which I hate talking publicly lol.
But ye everything is all good.
How about you?
Were in UK are u from?
He sounds like something has bothered him from his past and is very reserved. There is a doctor he is on you tube, very famous called doctor gabor I think, he studies addictions and child hood traumas, he says all addictions are from some child hood trauma, do you recan this could be the same with him?
That’s the wrong menatllity showing emotion is week. Maybe in war yes lol. But not as a human being. Its a human emotion and natural. I’ve cried loads of times on coke wanting to quit when it’s wearing off in desperation.
Sorry for asking but what was his dad like growing up with him? Was he strict? U don’t need to answer that if u don’t want to.
The thing is with our triggers ect.. It’s like having a devil and angel on your shoulder all day arguing, shall I get some shall I not. Not all the time – but a lot. And you limit these triggers by turning off the radio or going a different route so you don’t go past the pub. But also deep in are sub conscious are brain is tricking us in to getting some. It’s crazy how it all works and I’d be here all day explaining it lol.
Did he use last night?
Thanks for that ????
I was exactly the same with the groups, they are on zoom now, so he can just have his camera off for now, he doesn’t have to talk. I had zero confidence, made a balls up of talking 1st time but kept coming back. I’ve been on the meetings 112 days I think now, and I’m only just talking. You just have to take baby steps. Some people are not as confident as others. We need to face our fears. And coke makes you have no self esteem what so ever. Plus there is the talk of God that puts people off, u can have your own higher power, mine is the universe and energy as it is everywhere. Basically like the law of attraction. You treat people well, you get good back in life. If this makes sence.but if he trys them again just tell him babysteps and dnt be put off, we are all in the same boat, just listen to the stories.
I have done all this with the numbers but there is ways around it, blocking the nums it will still have them in numbers blocked. So just delete them. Or even get a new sim. When u are apart of CA u get other numbers, loads of addicts, you phone them when u are struggling and your sponsor so this could help with friends at work. I have had to cut family off who use. Recovery comes 1st then everything else falls into place.
Regarding the kids this is just my opinion, your there mother u know best, let him see them when he is not using, don’t let them stay at his if u think he is using. If you stop him all together I’m saying 90% he will just go and get smashed feeling sorry for him self making him worse. But this is up to you.
Him saying he wants to die is what
Coke does to you it sends you depressed and suicidal for days. Then u use again then same again Monday. Its horrible.
I’ve known friends who have had strokes from coke. He needs really want to quit for himself. Get rid of every friend are family member he knows to do with coke, and start working on his recovery. It’s hard. But the rewards are great. Feel free to ask me anything
Haha I stay out of politics they all piss in the same pot. Lol
I had the same mindset, but a alcohol and cocaine come in hand in hand, everyone says the same in the meetings. I have finally admitted that I have to give up alcohol if I want to quit cocaine. So I can’t ever drink again even though I am not an alcoholic. Drinking alcohol leads to wanting cocaine so much. That’s why everyone is on it in every pub and club. Then u start relying on this with out alcohol like I did.
You can search in Google.. Cocaine anonymous meetings in UK. And loads come up, most are online now, u just need to download zoom. What area are u from? You have some from areas, but as they are on zoom you can go on any meeting. This is because of the pandemic. But he really needs to want to quit for himself to do this.
That we’re he was in hospital, if he used and that caused him to be in hospital or was a few days before, I don’t know if u know, but when cocaine is wearing off basically an hour after using, it makes you depressed and suicidal, then the nxt few days you say I’m never doing it again, and then come Friday.. Your buying it again, all you think about is the positives of coke. Then depressed and suicidal again Monday. It’s a big vicious circle. But joining CA helps and you talk to addicts each day.
The minute u have a sip of alcohol u can be craving coke like mad. So I now have to quit alcohol even though I am not an alcoholic.
Has he tried cocaine anonymous meetings these have kept me clean for over 3 mth now
Your right there does need to be more training. I seen something the other day were they only have one day’s training for a certain medical condition am not to sure if it was alcoholics. But I can’t remember.
They are useless alot of docs. We are just numbers and targets now
Has he tried CA meetings?
Hiya Linda, I don’t know anyone personally who has been to there docs regarding this. And no one has spoke about it in the meetings..
He needs go back that addiction services and see what they say now, or could he try a diff doctor?
I guess he could just try ween him self off it for now. Just cut it down by a quatre each week of what he normally drinks. I’m not to clued up on medication for alcohol, sorry.
But tell him don’t just give up there, he needs keep going and believe in himself. His addictive brain will be saying now.. Ahh least we tried, get some beers in.. So he needs be positive and try the docs or that addiction place, and get to some meetings.
It’s ridiculous the doctor saying that ????????
Hiya Linda, I don’t know anyone personally who has been to there docs regarding this. And no one has spoke about it in the meetings..
He needs go back that addiction services and see what they say now, or could he try a diff doctor?
I guess he could just try ween him self off it for now. Just cut it down by a quatre each week of what he normally drinks. I’m not to clued up on medication for alcohol, sorry.
But tell him don’t just give up there, he needs keep going and believe in himself. His addictive brain will be saying now.. Ahh least we tried, get some beers in.. So he needs be positive and try the docs or that addiction place, and get to some meetings.
It’s ridiculous the doctor saying that ????????
Hiya becky, hope you are doing ok.
I’ve been using coke for 11 years but I’m now 10 days off 4 month clean. The best clean time I’ve ever done.
1st thing is in no way this is your fault, so don’t question yourself about it one bit. Saying if you let him move back he won’t do it is just lies and bullshit. We’re ever he goes he is addicted, so he’s gonaa have the same problem back at yours.
This is what I did to stop and what he needs to do. The 1st thing really is he needs to want to quit for himself. This is really important in recovery, if its you or a family member wanting him to it won’t happen 1 bit. He can try but the will power is not there. When coke is wearing off it sends u on a downer and depressed and suicidal and this is why I just had to quit I had had enough plus a few other reasons.
I tried lots of things to stop, hypnotist, councilling, take up hobbies and it does work for a few week. But then u think u are cured and your not.
So on boxing day I decided to join Cocaine anonymous, I don’t know if u no how this works, but u work the 12 steps and get a sponsor and other addicts numbers, go to meetings, and u connect each day and this is a big part in recovery. I always said I’d never join. But I did. I feel like I’m getting my life bacck now, I’ve never felt so happy. I do have my bad days as well. But I’m stronger now
Plus alcohol is a main trigger so u have to quit that as well they come hand in hand. Delete also dealers numbers, friends who u use with. Come off social media as u can message dealers on there as well.
Feel free to ask me anything
How are you all doing?
So glad to hear he is putting the effort in. If he puts his recovery 1st, everything else will fall into place. Always here if u need chat, have a good weekend
Hiya, I think it’s 10 a day. There just little black balls from what I remember. His using routine sounds like mine, every Friday ect. He needs to quit alcohol if he wants to quit coke, its a big trigger to get coke.
I’ll be honest I tried everything to quit, I was never to sure if the tablets worked for me. I didn’t use for a few weeks sometimes on the tablets, but I don’t know if it was them. But as long as you try these methods there is nothing wrong with it if it helps to quit.
I’m 10 days off 4 month clean the best clean time in 11 years of using. But this is because I joined cocaine anonymous and I’ve never felt so better and its helping me so much., I’m working the 12 steps and have a sponsor. Would your bf do this?
Hiya, hope you are OK.
I’m 107 days clean I think now from cocaine. I decided join CA after vowing never to go.
I couldn’t think of anything worse than using cocaine to beat depression, because cocaine causes depression and I mean alot. It uses all your dopmine so you have nothing left then it’s a bad come down for weeks. And feeling depressed.but each to there own I guess.
Soo.. How much clean time does he have? Does he have a sponsor? Does he go to meetings each day?
Also does he drink, because drinking is a main trigger for cocaine. I’ve had to quit alcohol aswell. Most people in recovery quit both even though they are not an alcoholic.
I’m in the meetings now, and I’ve read so many true addiction recovery books, and podcast with addicts. And a lot of people have years of clean time. Some have 2, 5 10 even more.
But what I have seen and heard from people from the meetings and this is true from my own experience. We can’t think we are cured anytime, and just have 1 small glass of beer, say 5 month, even 3 year down the line. We are never OK and some people have and gone back to using for years.
We have to stick to this programme for ever, go to meetings, connect to addicts ect.. Don’t get me wrong some people might just get 2 years in then just leave CA, and be OK. But would the addict want to risk that?
The programe makes us stronger and able to say no to a drink ect.. And we just ring our sponsor if we are struggling.
So my answer is yes recovery is possible if you put the effort in and stay away from using friends, don’t drink, and work the programme each day. Hope this helps. Feel free to ask me anything