Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Good on him. I’m happy for you both, hope it continues ????????
I don’t get how coke in your pocket will help at a meeting lol. That is his addictive brain thinking. It tricks you into so many things.
Regarding the spiritual aspect.. Please tell him what I tell you now.. I stopped believing in God along time ago. It doesn’t have to be God. It can be our own higher power which he will know from the meetings. Your higher power can be anything. It can be a dog if u wanted. Mine is basically the universe, good energy, think positive get positive solutions in life. Like the law of attraction. Treat others how you would like to be treated, be kind, be kind to the planet, recycle. Just that basically. And I pray each morning, and all I say is.. Higher power please take away my fears, make me stronger to fight my addiction. Protect my children. Just something like this. For one its not gonna kill you and if it helps beating an addiction. I’ll take that any day. The 1st few week will seem weird doing this. But tell him be more positive, believe in himself, and the rewards will be great. I can’t say nowt I’m only 11 week clean. But I feel great and things are going my way. It really does feel like law of attraction. Is working. He needs to meditate each morn as well. Just 10 mins listening to a you tube 1, or an app. It really helps to clear your mind..
Rome wasn’t built in a day so tell him don’t give up, and at least try these things for a few week. If I new what I new now I would of done this years ago. its just plain stupid taking coke into a meeting, and it’s not good on other people in recovery incase he mentions this to them. There are loads of online meetings through zoom if he goes on CA website.
That’s how exactly I feel, I’m the last 1 standing, and when the lock down is over I’m worried. But I’ve set some goals and boundary, no one is allowed our house. My gf has go out if she wants a drink. We are just gonna do things with the kids
I don’t want to feel depressed and suicidal for days from it. I’ve seen so many podcast where ex addicts have become so successful and feel so happy in life. I feel like I’m getting a taste of it. And I will do my best to keep going. Your partner will just be stuck in the same routine it’s a bout breaking it, and to be strong and believe in himself, and not to give up. Keep trying. Hope it goes well for him, ????????
Hiya sal hope your OK. I’m 11 week clean from coke. I started CA 11 week ago and have been clean since. Did he get a sponsor and work the steps at the meetings? I feel so much happier since joining and my life is on the right track.
I just used on my own and feel embarrassed. Does your partner want to quit? He needs get rid of the dealers nums and get a new num. Come off social media aswell we’re u can message them. That’s just the start. He can’t drink neither.
No, and I have the tools as they say now to help me. I just meditate now or pray to take these thoughts away. I feel great today and positive. I’m looking forward to the future now.
Sorry to hear this. Always here anyway for a chat ❤️
Hey there, hope your OK. I’m coming up to 12 week clean from cocaine. I’ve been using 11 years. And I have been doing my best to stop in the last 5 to 7 years I think.
The problem is with having a business and making good money. You spend more on coke and your addiction gets worse and debt piles up. I never really got in debt. I spent what I could afford. I started using on my own in the house. I’m not proud of my self and I hated it. When the coke wears off its called a come down. This makes us depressed and suicidal for days. It’s 1 big vicous circle.
If your husband wants to stop. And he needs to want to for himself or it won’t work. He needs to delete all dealers numbers, even friends and family who use. Come off all social media as u can message dealers. Blocking them won’t work, u just unblock them. With his business I don’t know how this will effect you with advertising so that’s up to you. He can’t drink alcohol again. Alcohol is a main trigger for coke. I can have 1 can and I’m ordering coke. Most people are like this.
He needs to implement new activities into his daily life to keep him occupied. I listen to a lot of cocaine recovery stories on you tube and podcast. I took up reading.
I’ve tried everything to quit, even hypnotist. I’d gone for weeks sometimes a month or 2. But I always relapsed.
My last relapse was boxing day. I just had enough. I decide to join CA anonymous and do the 12 steps and I got a sponsor. I’ve been clean since. I do zoom meetings each day, I meditate, pray, talk to other addicts. I always said I would never join, but I did. And do you know what.. I feel so much happier now, my kids have there dad back. I feel so positive, excited for the future. Just happy. The minute I wake up I get on my knees and pray. Never in a million years would I have done this last year. But if it keeps me clean and it’s free. Why not?
With you having a business and money situations, and u dont trust him. Buy some drug testing kits so he can prove to you he is staying clean. He will be like this forever now, but if he puts the effort in, and is determined to quit. He can leave a clean happy life.
Sorry if I’ve missed anything out. Feel free to ask me anything
Thanks ????
Sorry for the late reply I have only just seen this.
I know which film you mean and I get you. Love really does hurt.
I actually spoke twice on 2 meetings in Saturday and I’ve felt great since then. I really feel like I’m getting my confidence back. And my life back. No negative thinking aswell.
Thanks for your kind words. It means alot.
How are you doing now?
Thanks for that.
Yes I feel so much happier and no negative thinking. But it’s still early days.
It’s true what they say.. 1 bad apple spreads. My teacher use say it at school lol and he’s right. If he has seen other mates doing it, and peer pressure. He’s going to do the same. Best thing to do is cut them off straight away.
Are u even sure he even stopped taking? Its strange how he can start up again then start injecting.
Injecting is because they want a better and quicker high. Normally I guess he is hanging with someone who is injecting and that’s why he’s got on it. I’m 11 week clean from coke now. I’ve never injected. Does he want to stop?
This talk is coming down talks. Coming down off the coke. Feeling depressed and suicidal. It’s a horrible feeling. He probably has had enough of it all. This repeated vicious circle. But then the craving for coke out ways, what we will feel like after it.
He needs to get to some meetings, get on zoom, and find a CA meeting near him or any online. Tell him he doesn’t have to have his camera on, he doesn’t have to speak. Just listen to people’s shares. Tell him it will make him. Feel better that he is not alone. What area do u live? I can find a link and time for u and just mention it to him. At least u can say u have tried.
A lot of uses think like that. It’s just your addictive brain thinking there is nothing else to do or better. It’s just an excuse to use. Plus when your stuck in a rut it’s hard to get out of it and everything is just negative thinking.
Just keep coming on here talking it helps everyone and will help you.
Ye you can’t give up if your mates are dealers lol unless you shut them off.
You asked when do you give up being supportive? I think he has just given you your answer.. That he can’t play happy families because you want him tea total.
So he obviously doesn’t want to quit, you can’t make him to quit.
So the only options you have, stay with him and accept it, untill he hits his rock bottom and is prepared to quit. You just go do your thing have fun with your friends and child and leave him to his own devices.
Or just leave and move on with your own life. That’s the only way I can see it.
What are your thoughts on what he said about not playing happy families.
Thanks for that I’ll have a look at it.
There is a book called.. Mum can you lend me 20quid?. It’s about a mum who had twin boys, both on heroin and how she lost 1 to it. Its from her perspective. It’s a great read.
I thought it was exactly them to the 3 questions, I guess it makes it alot worse when they are our soul mates or someone we thought we would spend the rest of our life together. And the last 2 guilty and doubt. You will never know the answer to. If you stayed would he have stopped. It’s not worth worrying about. It’s apart of life. What would of happened if I didn’t do this and that.. If I didn’t meet this person ect.. Its just part and parcel of life. Its happened, you did your best and move on. We all have our own journeys?. Have you read.. Many lives many masters? its about reincarnation and about how a doctor does past life regression on a patient for months, and he finds out loads of secrets about life, and how are loved ones are with us in past lifes. Honestly it’s amazing. The guy has been on Oprah and sold millions of books.
God’s honest truth sometimes talking about it does trigger it for me I’m not going to lie. My brain will trick me into wanting it by any means necessary. It did being on here the other day. But part of my 12 step program is I need to connect. And it does help me. I had a bad dream about using last night again. I woke up feeling guilty and that I’d used. I jumped on a meeting. And even spoke! I never speak, I hate stuff like that. But I need to or I can see me relapses..and now I feel great! Its weird how our addictions control us, turns us into bad people. The devil on our shoulder will manipulate you anyway. And u won’t even know. Even listening to a dance song can make me want to use. The thought of going out, get some coke. My best advice to anyone don’t even try coke! Not even alcohol. Why would you want to? People think that’s all there is. I can’t say anything lol but I’m getting to think that way.
Thanks for your positive comments. Hope you are well ????????
Thanks for that. I really appreciate it. I told her take my keys off me tonight because I’ve dreamed alot this week of using. And there locked in a safe now. I have no way of contacting dealers on my phone. And I deleted all social media. That just makes you worse. Even people who are not addicts.
Why do you feel doubt, loneliness and guilt? If u don’t mind me asking.
Your right she is good to me, she has stuck by me and I put her through a lot of shit. She still doesn’t trust me and I don’t blame her. It could take years.
You will get there in the end just stay positive. ????❤️