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Yeah regardless of what doctor says you have to have kids interests and safety first thatd what SS want to see dont take that wrong I’m trying to help
Regards
Soo where do I start
The cockyness is a control technique. Hes on a hype hes passed 1 drug test and will make your feel like you should of trusted him all along. Do not fall for it. I used to do this and it is an head game. He is very vulnerable at the minute and think he will deserve trust back. Do not give it him. Make sure you drug test him in 2 days still. Make clear that he has no control and you wont put up with his crap.
And what a can of worms he has opened. I recommend that you tell him to go and stay with family. Reason for this is ss will want to know that the kids are not at risk. They will conduct a full assessment now which involves speaking to both of yous. The kids on there own. School. The kids doctors. If you say you didnt know and now you have made him leave they will back you as you have put the kids safety first. You need to do this it’s the only way till this is over.
This could cause alot of trouble for you if you dont trust me on this one.
You still need to make him do the drug tests while he is away aswell
Sorry the advice is not great. Your husband needs to sign up for a drug help service as soon as possible. Dont make ss tell him to do it you do it before.
Regards
Daz
Currently in aldi buying some shopping and treats for me and kids and ex wife we are watching a film tonight at hotel. Will reply when I get out of here as I have a feeling what’s happening and what’s going to happen as I know
Regards
Daz
I was curious about this aswell but didnt want to ask
Its gonna be hard. He will come back one day and you need to remember what hes put you through. He doesn’t deserve you. If you need anything we are all here for you
I’ll tell you straight. 2 addicts will end in disaster… imagine 2 dead car batteries. Theres no spark. Now is the time to be concerned about yourself and forget about him it really is
Louise is right if the user doesn’t want to stop they won’t stop..
I’m in a hotel on my own on day 18. I’ve got a long way to go but I had to scrape the bottom. I’m upset and a bit lonely today I’ll be honest because I want to be sat watching a film with my children and doing family things now but I’ve had my chances. I need to face reality.
My ex wife knows I’m trying to change but that doesn’t take my past actions away and she cant trust me. I’ve learnt to come to terms that me and her cant be together again. It hurts yes but I know I’ve got to be better than I was before and nothing will set me back.
She gave me a chance 3months back either drugs or her. Clearly I didnt want to make my choice.
I wouldn’t of changed. You need to cut him off completely till you know yourself he is clean. His words mean nothing now. It’s how his actions show
Sat here listening to smooth radio reading these comments.
It’s so horrible the effects it has. The torture it causes etc. I do believe awareness is very important going forward as 1 in 3 people apparently have tried this drug. They think its socially acceptable now. I’ve made a decision that I’m not going in pubs when they reopen. I’d rather take someone out for a meal. But I will not trigger mysekf
The brain damage usually in most cases is reversible I’ve read alot on this. But yes I’m saying if I can do it anyone can because I was spending about 180 every day on it. Dont know who saved me but I thought I was a lost cause but ik doing it and will do.
I wish you luck I honestly do
Just read it back. Yes I never knew how I was acting. Explosive unreal comments that are hurtful and nasty. Belittling comments its horrible I batter myself every day for the way I acted as I’m not like that. Dont feel sorry for them though it can leave mental scars etc.
Well its easy to try and hide your use if no one is questioning you on it.
The confrontation starts when you question and the blame gets out on the opposite person. The problem is the user knows his worlds is crashing down and goes into defensive and cant help themselves out. Well they can it’s just the dont want too. The defensive mode can last for years so yeah.
And what you mean not a clue lol
Update on me.
I have my apprenticeship in september that I’m starting.
I’ve also just been told I’ve got a job starting monday that I can stay till september.
I believe things do get better it just takes time.
With my ex wife am happy the way things are. I accept what’s happened and we can build a new life separately in the best interests of our children.
If I roll back a month I was being an arse snorting my life away.
Cant wait to get this new life going.
Well its hard to get 20 pounds worth of coke. The bigger picture is the destructive behaviour that is the big sign. If you know what hes like and hes not right usually instinct is right. The behaviour gets worse trust me I know. I’ve found clarity and peace in myself as I’ve displayed patterns like this when I was caught in it.
If you are unsure test him.do not give him money regardless of the situation. Do not lend him your car do not enable him in any way.
If the test comes back positive then you have to create a plan what’s going to make you happy and what’s best moving forward.
Good you have something to strive towards ???? and if hes said that he sounds like he is really trying bless him. After 7 days he will bs a bit more clear headed. Reality is though its 10 weeks. Week 1 to 10 he will experience lack of sleep, vivid dreams, mood swings etc…
When he starts night sweats it means his liver functionality will be returning to normal this is common. He just has to ride it out. And routine is key especially what time to go bed and get up.
I was up till 4 am yesterday morning but I made sure I was out of bed at 7.30 hence why I slept last night.
Any questions at all am here
Oh he needs to set some short term goals. Sit with him and help him.put it in his notes on his phone and give him something to aim for short term. Here is mine:-
1)I want to stop and be clean. Drugs have consumed everything you had. Sort your shit and sort your fucking life. Day number = Day 17
2)I want a permanent job (target on track jobs applied for) prove every single person wrong you have it it yourself to do this!
3)I want to be settled in my own house (target on track and should be done by 25th June)
4)I want a nice car
5) learn to look after yourself. Love yourself and love other people. Dont dwell on what you have lost but what you have got to look forward too. Learn to love life again without drugs.
6)I will be a good Dad
Achievement to be on track by september
I set them on 20th may things have changed they need updating a bit lol
So he wont know this. His head will be very cloudy. He will be irritable as in very very bored. He will feel lethargic. He will also be thinking about getting some more but you have to tell yourself I can do this.
I suggest going for a walk together in the evening.
His receptors in his brain are blocked and he wont feel excitement or happiness. This is where the comments come in. If he creates an arguement he has an excuse to go out. You can take his wallet all you want if he wants it that bad he will get it. Just reassure him that if he goes another 7 days the physical cravings will disperse.
Dont mother him but make it clear you have a choice. You either try and you can do this with you or he can do it on his own and you have to be firm!!
He will of been down because he is feeling guilt for what hes spent. Reassure him you forgive him for that but you aren’t happy. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you are letting him off with it but you will move forward together and get through it.
Once that cycle of his guilt is broken the cycle is broken. I used to use then be on a comedown fell sorry for myself then use because I felt guilty and it would make me feel normal again. And it would repeat.
But like I said next couple of days are crucial