[dunc-da-junkie]

Nobody is vaping heroin and crack. Why don’t you try talking to him? Open a decent line of communication. Try to have a bit of understanding. If you genuinely care about the person it should be far more important to you to not shut him out and actually listen. I’m in no way saying you should enable his drug use in any way, that is not what you want to be doing and can easily and very quickly become a messy situation. What is extremely important tho is to ensure he knows how much you care and that you are always there to support his recovery. Look up local groups, possibly suggest going along with him. Try your best not to get angry. All that will do is make him feel isolated in his pain. People going through addiction don’t ever feel good about it, but once it’s got it’s hooks into you it is so difficult to shake off. The thing is there will be times he will be managing things better, this is when you might be able to have rational discussions about recovery and make plans. There will also be times he’s not managing for whatever reason, it could be something small or it could be some serious long term issues. Generally speaking people with addiction issues also have mental health issues and very often have suffered some kind of trauma. If it is your son this can be difficult to talk about. So when he’s not managing, this is the difficult part where he will most likely lie, behave unreasonably and possibly appear not to care about anything other than serving his addiction. This will be painful and difficult for you, but please try to understand it is also painful and difficult for him. When the addiction takes over it is always the people closest who get hurt the most. He will not feel one bit good about this. Try to remember he is not just an addict but also a person. Try to remind yourself, and him if it’s safe to do so, of the person he was before the addiction took over. It is so easy to marginalise addicts, even when it is your own child. Try and remember, how ever messed up it becomes, that they are people with feelings too, and they are probably dealing with some very difficult issues. Again I’m not saying it’s ok, it’s very difficult to balance giving a loved one support without enabling negative behaviour and/or getting badly hurt yourself. Best of luck, I really hope you manage to get your son back in one piece. The war on drugs was lost a long time ago, these are victims of this disastrous situation created by the failed war on drugs.

I am extremely experienced in all things related to drugs illicit and otherwise, toxicology, addiction, mental health and harm reduction. If I can help with any insights or information and support of any kind please don’t hesitate to contact me. I have over 20 years experience in the field and I want so much to help anyone struggling with this terrible affliction.

Lots of love,

Dunc da Junkie

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