[elaine1966]

I know exactly how you are feeling, I myself have reached out for help due to my husband’s heavy drinking and the effect it is having on me. Similar to your husband mine also agreed to only drink in moderation on a Saturday. This lasted give the occasional lapse where he would binge for a few days then feel sorry for his actions and promise not to do it again. But he always does. Now he has gone to drinking in secret when I have left the house for a couple of hours. Trouble is I always know when he has been drinking because his whole attitude changes. He doesn’t make a pretty, happy drunk. But when her had a drink he does not care about anything or anyone. It’s a repeated pattern that I am at my wits end with. He will cause arguments or the worst atmosphere to incite an argument just to justify having his next drink. We are on the verge of separating at the moment and although it probably is the best thing because it has become a toxic situation, but at one time I felt that I was more important to him than his next drink, but not anymore. I see no other way than to split or to put up and shut up because he does not seem to want to try anymore. It does hurt, because I thought I could be the one to save him, and feel a bit of a failure because now I’m realising that I can’t. Feeling so low, desperate and angry. Feel he is so selfish. He is never there for me, not really

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