[Harristotle]

Hi Anna, hope that’s your name as that’s what I chose for my daughter! I am going through similar currently, husband out of rehab last September, I stayed to let him settle worried for his mental health and his new job, weighing up pros and cons and terrified of being blamed for making a mistake should I leave while our child is still preschool age. Not seriously worried about money but life will be more work should I leave. And I am juggling other things outside of this. Its completely overwhelming. How are you getting on? Honestly hoping you are a few months further on than I so I can take notes but just reread the end of your post and am concerned it might be the other way around. Boundaries will help you. Set them, communicate them, stick to them. Addicts can still understand consequences. If you are not happy, let it be known, use i feel sentences backed up with evidence and explain clearly what you need, what you are willing to accept, what you are not willing to accept, and what you will choose to do should your needs continue to go unmet. Think about what those things are for you, write them down. Make above plan. Follow through. You will get your answer. You are your first priority, then your children as you cant rely on yourself to care for them if wore down to dust by your partner’s behaviour, and unsupportive partner right now is way down the list. You should not have to be hypervigilant re your partner’s behaviour in your marriage when you already have twins and a third. Sounds like you currently have a fourth child to ‘look out for’. I’m sorry. It sucks. How are you doing / how did solicitor go? Well done on booking that, big step whichever way it goes in the end Xxx

[Author]

Posts