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Prayers for you and for your son. How are things going now? Hoping he made it to rehab and you can finally sleep at night. If not please do not lose hope. You are not alone
Im so sorry you’re going through this…I can relate to everything unfortunately. My fiancé needs to have that nose surgery but since he is still using he does not qualify. He smokes it as well though. I think its so unfair that they “storm off” or take out their anger on us when we have the right to be angry about what we found or our suspicions. He is just taking the attention off of him and hoping you beg for him to come home. Anyways, I don’t blame you for not wanting to tell anyone. Having a partner who is an addict is embarrassing and I get it. I think the most you can do right now is try to get him while he’s sober and have a chat with him about what is going on and set some boundaries. If he has no ambition to stop, I would leave, at least short term. Ive been dealing with it for five years and I can’t begin to tell you how fucked its gotten my head. Honestly put yourself first. You can’t help him. He will get help when he’s ready and realizes you’re seriously not going to put up with this. I wish I set my boundaries at the beginning of his addiction 🙁 If you have a close friend you can trust reach out. This is my first time on here but I’m willing to chat also, although there is no light at the end of the tunnel until you leave 🙁