[AnonJ]

Right, I will post this again through web so it doesn’t get fucked up  …

[AnonJ]

Hi SaoirseJS,

I’m so sorry you are and were going through this.

I have yet to read through this but I wanted to reach out and comment, as I know it’ll take me some time and when I post here I keep coming back to check in – and I want you to know you are not alone.

That “I fucked up” is all too familiar, it is so terrifying. You have been strong to stood by him for so long, and please remember that when they are high they can not see the nightmare you are going through.

It pains me to read you have split up, I can’t imagine how hard that has been on you – but you know what is best for you – you know your limits, and I’m proud of you for taking the steps towards your own happiness! that is what is important.

My partner and I are together, and every time I read here about failed relationship I am terrified. But I am hopefull, and I have faith in him and his actions to stop our own rollercoaster.

Thank you for sharing your story, be strong and have faith in yourself that you deserve a life without these rollercoasters, I will read through this and comment again.

[AnonJ]

Seems like something went surly wrong with this comment I shall try again below 🙂

 
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>Hi James and other family members here,</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>This is my first time writing, in a desperate attempt to find a family / partners group and see what others might be going through, because none of my friends can ever understand this.</span></p>
 
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>My partner has a cocaine addiction, even though sometimes he would not admit it.</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>He had a few relapses in the past months, some more difficult than others. </span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>We have not been together for too long and I am trying to find my way around this, as someone said here earlier- he is my soulmate when he is sober, but when the addiction takes over it is always a source of pain and agony.</span></p>
 
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>I have made some good and bad decisions while trying to support him through binges, yet somehow they all felt like they were wrong. I am naturally a Self-sacrificing type person and I can not stand aside and watch him burn his life to the ground, but sometimes I fear I am also not setting enough boundaries – for him, for me, in the worry he might leave because I might be harsh.</span></p>
 
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>The situation that usually unfolds is he will disappear for a couple of days, then while still high text me and apologize but then try to continue normal conversation- until he is able to sleep.</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”> I worry if I behave as if things are normal while he’s high – it’ll normalize the use , but if I decide to not allow normal conversation to continue- I demonize it and make him hide it from me.</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>
i hope this question makes sense and is not too broad, basically would love to hear how others have dealt with their partners during their binges.
</span></p>
 
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>Thank you for sharing, just reading through the forum here has been quite useful.</span></p>
J

 

[AnonJ]

<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>Hi James and other family members here,</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>This is my first time writing, in a desperate attempt to find a family / partners group and see what others might be going through, because none of my friends can ever understand this.</span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>My partner has a cocaine addiction, even though sometimes he would not admit it.</span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>He had a few relapses in the past months, some more difficult than others. </span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>We have not been together for too long and I am trying to find my way around this, as someone said here earlier- he is my soulmate when he is sober, but when the addiction takes over it is always a source of pain and agony.</span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”> I have made some good and bad decisions while trying to support him through binges, yet somehow they all felt like they were wrong. </span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>I am naturally a Self-sacrificing type person and I can not stand aside and watch him burn his life to the ground, but sometimes I fear I am also not setting enough boundaries – for him, for me, in the worry he might leave because I might be harsh.</span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>The situation that usually unfolds is he will disappear for a couple of days, then while still high text me and apologize but then try to continue normal conversation- until he is able to sleep. </span></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>I worry if I behave as if things are normal while he’s high – it’ll normalize the use , but if I decide to not allow normal conversation to continue- I demonize it and make him hide it from me. </span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>I hope this question makes sense and is not too broad, basically would love to hear how others have dealt with their partners during their binges. </span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>Thank you for sharing, just reading through the forum here has been quite useful.</span></p>
<p class=”p2″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; min-height: 22px; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”></p>
<p class=”p1″ style=”margin: 0px; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 17px; line-height: normal; caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;”><span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;”>J</span></p>

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