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Yes I agree I get so angry when he calls me wheedling for yet more money. He has almost brought me to my knees taking cash and not giving a damn if I can afford it. I invited him for a bar b que recently he went to the loo and I found 10 pound which I had got out to give him so he could get to work had gone from my purse. I just dispair
Thank you Jenny my son text me last night could I take him to get some food. Which I did I let him pay mainly because at the min I am broke. We didn’t speak much I told him I would get some food for his freezer when I am paid but he said no he was ok. So now I am leaving it I won’t contact him but will respond if he needs to call me. It’s hard all I want is my son leading a relatively normal life. Please god x
I share your nightmare my 28 year old son is addicted to cocaine I have given him food, cash, paid debts and dealers he has financially brought me to my knees. I am now doing what I should have done 10 years ago and I now won’t and can’t afford to give him anything he threatens, insults, swears and manipulates me. I am so very tired and see no end to it. My biggest fear is that he will end up on the streets but I can’t help anymore because it isn’t helping
Putting you off the scent maybe or hoping too.
Not at the minute. I think it’s when he is low he wants help. He started going to cocaine anon then we had lockdown he says he still in touch but I don’t believe him. He has to come to me now and ask for help not financial but support which I will always be here for. I should have left things alone last year his ex left with the children he was going to court for rent atrears I went with him explained his situation he got suspended order but he still doesn’t care. It’s only cos I arranged for rent to come out when his pay goes in that it gets paid. I step back now
No I understand that. To just have a normal life I know my son would want that. It sounds so stupid but I just want to hold him and make things right and there is no way I can fix this only he can and I hope one day he will understand that what I am doing now is because I have tried everything else and it’s keeping him there
He lost his last job they were supportive because he was honest with them. He still kept taking time off and they let him go. This job is going the same way and yes you are right his recovery is more important. All this is so alien to me you work you pay your bills you build a life. I hope that as he is 28 he has time Well I hope
Thank you for that. Yes that makes sense I am sure he is disappointed in himself why would you want anyone to witness that. I take a bit of reassurance from your last comments and pray he will be one of these cases. I haven’t heard from him and won’t contact him. I suppose I am scared to hear if his job is on the line. That will be the beginning of either his recovery or downward spiral x
I often wonder. My son, looking back was showing initial signs of drug taking/experimenting whennhe was about 15. I think now why didn’t I see it, could I have done something ,would things be different now. He will hate me for not giving him money but at some point I have to stop. In my heart I don’t think he will recover from this. My worst fear is that he will end up a drug addict living rough. I know he uses coke and maybe I’m being thick here but when he has taken something he won’t let anyone see him surely coke makes you chatty and sociable
Bless you. I have quite an addictive nature as well never know when to stop
Well done. Alcohol is difficult to get off I have a cousin who is alcoholic. Tried to stop several times but not managed
What is your story if you don’t mind me asking.
I am not sure he does want to stop sometimes he says he does and will make the right noises but within a couple of weeks or when he has got money out of me he is lost again. I think I have given up hoping he will stop I don’t think he will unless something major happens. Yes my thoughts are of him being on the streets with nothing it breaks my heart
Yes reading up may help me understand. I struggle with how much money he gets through. When he gets paid I assume he has to pay people off but it’s never ending
Yes I have come to that conclusion but it doesn’t make it easier I know I need to do it though. He will hate me. Sometimes I think he does anyway