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kate1Participant
2 years on and I am still in the same place lots of threatening texts today because he has no money to get to work and I am not bailing him out. Before Christmas he had over 3000 off me that was my buffer I am now starting to struggle financially even though I have a good job. I hate the thought of him losing everything but maybe that is what it will take. Can anyone advise please
kate1ParticipantHe asked me to go see him last night which I did. As soon as I got in the door he put his arms around me tight and sobbed….what have I done mum what have I done…….I have to admit I paid his rent but his very expensive car will have to go….if he stays off cocaine which I am hopeful he will there is no reason he can’t keep the house going. I called this morning and he is on his way to work. One dealer he told his situation to said he hears this so much…people losing everything….the other one offered him more …….thankfully he declined….watch this space I have either lost a lot of money or it will be money well spent
kate1ParticipantI do hope so…….sometimes we have to be cruel to be kind……in the long run. I spoke to my son lunch time he was on his way to take all his pay out to hand over to these dealers…..what an idiot. He says it won’t leave him with much…..no I know it won’t just enough to get to work, I will get him food but I dare say they will take his car next week. I got him in touch with cocaine anonymous but I can tell he isn’t really full on with it.
How much does your son owe did he tell you, I had a fit my son finally admitted he has to hand over 1400……I think you would be right to turf him out, we make it to easy I wish I had stopped bailing my son out years ago maybe if I had we wouldnt have got to this position. I am now waiting for him to start asking for money……I love him I want him back drug free
kate1ParticipantWell this is the day everything falls apart. My sons partner took the children and left last night. Housing want the rent arrears the dealers want their money and my son doesn’t earn enough to pay half of it…..I thought about taking a loan but after his partner saying not even that would change things I decided against it….rightly or wrongly. He seems to have accepted things but is obviously not happy. I have cried I don’t know how this will end. I just want him to sort himself out….he works hard to hand it to these leaches. Will losing everything now teach him something I hope so
kate1ParticipantI had the same 10 he wanted I had already given 20. My payday today and I am not going to watch it all go to pay his bills. He needs to take responsibility now
kate1ParticipantI know………but what do you do when he can’t even get to bloody work
kate1ParticipantYes it is their problem so why do I feel so guilty saying no…..he wants 10 pound a day off me to get to work…..then next Friday it will be nothing paid….and I can’t do it. I get paid tomorrow and I can see me being out of money by next week
kate1ParticipantBecause they know they can get away with it…….I am in a decent job but because of all this I am juggling money about so I can pay my own petrol….I am so tired of it all. I am dreading next week I think he is accepting the fact that his car will be gone
kate1ParticipantI spoke with his girlfriend today she made a point of saying she only had 20 pound notes in her purse……and she is expecting me to pay his petrol next week……she is really taking the mick telling me that then in the next breath she has no money. On one hand I understand but it shouldn’t be down to me to ensure their rent gets paid and he gets to work.
My son says she has been saying he won’t be seeing the kids……how on earth is this all going to end
kate1ParticipantGod knows…..I actually wonder if the fact that I said I would put a bit towards the rent actually made him think oh I might be able to do it tonight it’s ok cos mum is going to help with rent…..trouble is nothing else will get paid and he won’t afford to get to work…….his girlfriend now says she is leaving end of next week so there is not any point me helping ….I am just pulling myself down with him. He may be better off not working he hasn’t got money so hopefully the dealers won’t be interested in him
kate1ParticipantHe got back at 2 this morning he says he tried to do something but they wouldn’t give it cos he owes…..so he just drove about. His partner says she is leaving end next week……I can’t afford to pay everything for him so I don’t know what to do……
kate1ParticipantSounds familiar………..I blame myself maybe I gave him hope then took it away but I did say if he paid dealers and put rest to rent I would top rent up but car would go…….it’s to late if he wanted things different he wouldn’t do this would he
kate1ParticipantWell my son hasn’t gone home….he isn’t answering his phone so we know what he is doing…..I gave his partner 20 for his petrol and she gave it to him. That’s it now I can’t help him…..
kate1ParticipantI rang frank couldn’t get to speak to senior……playing it by ear. First thing pay dealers see what’s left of his money and if he wants help or not….got to think positive
kate1ParticipantYes I have spoken to people who agree it’s the right thing to do, doesn’t make it easy though……let’s see how it goes…I told him pay the dealers , stop taking drugs then start again……
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