[kel1]

Personally I’d say he is considering you which is pretty positive. I reckon he’ll come back to you. Seems honest enough and upfront which is good.

If it’s meant to be then he’ll be back. Keep strong and hold onto hope. It’s really all we have left.

[kel1]

Well if he spoke with you then that’s a little bit of him including you init.

Mine was loyal for 22 years, great man and we had it all. Holidays three times a year good jobs etc to this nightmare. Sounds like he is trying to include you. I get the odd message about the kids that’s it. Even got a message asking if we should buy joint birthday presents for the kids which is weird being as though we’re separated. Wished he’d just communicate but in truth I don’t think he can forgive himself for cheating on me. He hated guys that did that as his mum cheated on his dad and he held firm beliefs about it then he did it to me. . Gutted how we went from the cute couple to this. We was honestly a couple you’d not have thought we’d been together so long as we held hands on the sofa at night and cuddled in public still.

[kel1]

Micheal sealey is good for meditation check him out. Also acupuncture is meant to be good for deep relaxation. Sounds like you’re really into self care which is what it’s all about

[kel1]

I kind of get that they need to get away to focus on themselves, but I do wonder why they walk away from the people they love and care for. Could be guilt, undeserving, or even the “trigger of pleasure” who knows.

I hope he does communicate with you soon so you aren’t left in limbo. And you deserve a healthy life just hope you two can get that together.

Mine is on another planet at the moment so far away from my lil family.

[kel1]

It’s upsetting isn’t it. I guess he is doing the right thing by focusing on himself to help himself hopefully so that he can be a better person for you.

Mine is apparently depressed and unable to work, void of any emotions and is still in blame mode. I think he is probably still actively using.

I feel like I’m in a nightmare I can’t wake up from.

I go to Al Anon meetings now as I need support and to learn how to focus on me and not his addiction. I got so caught up in it all and shouldered the blame that I lost who I am.

I have developed an anxiety issue and lost so much weight.

Everyone says I deserve better, but before this drug took hold he was a nice fella, partner and father.

[kel1]

Keep strong and motivated. Have you tried hot yoga?

[kel1]

I wish I had the strength to contact my ex and tell him about them also. But apparently he hasn’t got an issue – denial.

You know what makes me sad reading all the threads about cocaine and it’s affects is how sometimes losing family isn’t even some addicts rock bottom.

[kel1]

Well keep taking them then lol you never know they could work.

That drug is lethal and I’m going to raise awareness when I’m strong enough. Reckon more should be done as prevention measures.

I’m literally exhausted with it all so I’m sure you must be also.

[kel1]

Thank you and yeh I totally agree. I hope you can beat this thing once and for all. Apparently there’s this Chinese herb stuff which I saw in Louise Clarke video to help with cravings – might help.

[kel1]

Feels like I’ve lost him forever. Sad times. Thanks for listening to me

[kel1]

Well he said he was using on and off for about six months, but I tested him twice within two weeks and both tests positive for cocaine and cannabis. I reckon he was using daily to be fair or at least three times week judging by the running nose, sneezing, dilated eyes, talkativeness and mood swings. My God I was blind, I put it down to midlife crisis but all the while I guess it was the other stuff

[kel1]

I wouldn’t give him any money as I am sure it’s going on drugs and not anything else. I’m sick of all the worry and stress he has caused all of us.

He is literally like a robot. I do wonder if it affects everyone that way. He has no emotions

[kel1]

Thanks for the support. I think it’s that what I am struggling with the most – the sudden change. He had literally transformed into the most selfish person I’ve ever come across. My poor girls are at a loss also I can see it on their faces. My little family unit is now just us.

This all happened one week before Xmas imagine the horror on all our faces. Selfish!. He told me to tell nobody that he cheated on me which meant for some time I had no support. That didn’t last though because I was so stressed people could see it on my face.

Most people’s husband’s atleast try to come back tho – mine as fucked off completely. Taking even my right to decide whether I want him back or not. Stripped me of even my dignity.

[kel1]

Thanks Dan, and I’m it’s great that you are trying recovery. I’ve started to attend Al Anon so that I can get some support and try to detach from it all. All I do is search my mind every minute of the day working out how someone can change so quickly.

At the moment he isn’t even contacting the kids which also makes me feel guilty. It’s like his piled all responsibilities onto me and I’ve taken them on.

I’m currently off work which has been two months now and I still don’t feel ready to go back. I’m so drained and now developed an anxiety issue.

Recently his asked me for 7k to get him started again In life – what a joke. I doubt it’s for a place to live.

I’m up and down at the moment – thoughts are not so often now thankfully and a bit easier to manage. I’m just so scared and can’t believe this man has changed so much.

I don’t think he wants help. Seems to be enjoying this new life sadly. He acts so out of character, however I’ve been told he now has depressive episodes – come downs I’m sure but his mother is not listening to me about his drug issues.

I’m just lost Totally lost.

[kel1]

They do start on a low dose and titrate up so he might be increased anyway when he goes next

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