[kf]

I know exactly what your going through and I really feel for you, it’s not easy. I have been in the same situation and let me assure you it doesn’t get better, it only gets worse. You will never have that ‘normal life’ you crave he will just suck you in and bleed you dry, I’m talking from experience here I was with a heroin addict for 8 years! 8 years I spent thinking I could change him! When things were good they were really good but in reality the bad times outweighed the good times I just struggled to see this whilst with him. We have a mortgage and a child together and have recently just split, I couldn’t take anymore!! His drug use was having and impact on me and our little boy so I fled for our safety. He has lied, stole, hit me not to mention the large amount of debt he has racked up which I am jointly several for. I have been categorised as high risk for physical, mental and emotional abuse by woman’s aid and I have little confidence in myself for which my ex is responsible for. Please get out of this quickly. Heroin destroys life’s! Not just the person that is using! Heroin has destroyed my life and I have witnessed many things over the years no one should have to see. Whatever you decide I hope it works out for you x

[kf]

Thanks for your advice it’s much appreciated. I don’t know your whole situation but I hope your situation improves too. Addiction is such a horrible thing not just for the person with the addiction but for their loved ones also. Thanks again I’m really glad I found this site xxx

[kf]

Thanks for your reply didn’t really expect a reply. It doesn’t seem to have an effect on my son at this moment in time as I always make sure he doesn’t have contact with his dad when he’s stoned. I always put my little boy first and make alternative arrangements/ decisions when he’s been using. My little boy is definately more a daddy’s boy he absolutely dotes on his dad and when I left his dad last year it broke his little heart. I was bombarded with questions… Questions I could not always answer. It’s hard! I mean what do I say to him? I sure as hell can’t tell him the truth that his father has more love for drugs than us. I suppose I’m scared in a way that my little boy is going to resent me for leaving his dad. I love my son more than life and he’s always my priority. I make sure there is no drugs in the house well apart from his methadone which is stored in a safe with a code which I have the code for too and that’s in a locked cupboard. My partner can go months without using this is what I’m finding hard to deal with and he really doesn’t want to do heroin anymore, he has told me he wants help to get off it. Methadone isn’t helping he has become reliant on it. He has been attending drug counselling and he has spoken to his doctor about doing subutex (don’t know if that’s how you spell it) and has also spoken about this implant thing so I know he wants to give it up. Thing is when he’s not using he is a brilliant daddy to our son as I mentioned above my little boy absolutely adores him. You are absolutely right though I do not want our son turning out like his dad. I sometimes think to myself if my partner used drugs all the time it would be sooo much easier to leave. I do to but I honestly thought me leaving last year would be his wake up call… Obviously I was wrong xxx

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