Thankyou for your reply, its just so hard, i love it when he is himself and we are a happy little family but it seems the bad days are now out waying the good. I have the worst self esteem ever, im constantly paranoid or worried, being forever let down, hurt and argued with. I just wish he cud see things from my side and feel the hurt and upset i feel, but its always about him and my emotions and feeling never get considered. Its so hard, ive said i hate him when he uses but deeply love him when hes him, i feel thats why i dont just leave but im not sure how much more i can take. I understand its an addiction and its not as easy as to say just stop, but i feel i cant help him but also cant walk away.
