[lawn01]

Sorry to hear that Debbie. It’s the lies

Loosing the trust.

She majorly flipped out this morning. I kept calm. She went back to bed

When she woke up at 11:00 I told her she can’t talk to me like that.

Again putting the blame on me about bringing up the past. Telling me to leave it instead toxic arguing.

She can’t remember what she said.

It’s breaking my heart. From being so strong mentally over the last 4 years lost my divorce I’m starting to feel broken.

Her insults are so personal. Blowing everything out of preportion.

[lawn01]

So she is refusing to say she has a problem and actually said you can’t tell me what to do.

Another complete visit polar weekend of letting the smallest thing get on top of her.

Over reaction.

I’ve started walking away.

When it’s hot peaceful later, I ask her why she brought up them things and she says there you go you are bringing up the past.

My dad says leave.

But I’m holding on. Do t know whether it’s the coke or that she is going through menopause as well.

It’s hard as well as as soon as she’s irrational you think she’s been on it.

Friday night she made something out of nothing, was very critical and rude.

I asked her if she had done coke and she flipped out. Saying that I’d isn’t trust her.

it’s confusing!!

[lawn01]

Sorry to hear that.

So it’s peaceful at the moment. Very abusive and insecure on Tuesday. All sorts of threats of moving out. Blaming me.

I haven’t bought the cocaine yo yet this week as I was told it was pointless discussing it with a user in their come down.

Sick of arguing as well so peace and quite is nice at the moment.

[lawn01]

All the best Buster!

[lawn01]

So on Saturday everything changed.

1pm before my partner was going on a day out with her son who is 15, I saw her doing coke in her office with the door closed 3ft from her son.

We are a blended family of 4 years and she’s had a tough time with her own father and ex husband who is an an alcoholic, cocaine user. The behaviour of the father has made the children very vulnerable and with behaviour and anxiety problems. I have 2 she’s has 2 children and we have lived in a Lovely house for 18 months now.

When we first me 4 years ago I caught her doing a livener just weeks after he son had caught the dad doing coke. This affected him greatly. The dad is now not around.

Last year I found a rolled up £50 cue a big argument. Boxing Day I caught her doing a line before we were going to play Board games and again last month I found coke in her office.

I swabbed the house last month found it in a number of places and she promised she’s deleted all the dealers numbers. On Saturday she was doing it on an iPad. So I’d never know if I swabbed surfaces again.

She claims that’s the only time she’s done it. But Saturday was different it was 1pm.

We have had loads of problems with her daughters schooling and behaviour over the last 9 months which I think has sent her over the edge.

Doing coke is not acceptable though. Now i don’t know if she’s been a user for the whole time we’ve been together.

I confronted her. Now she refuses to talk to me and doesn’t admit she has a problem, says it’s normal, acceptable .

Her behaviours are exactly how the poster described. Exactly.

She has a high flying job but rarely gets out of bed before 11am. Always chasing around to catch up time. She’s bi polar, always angry with something, no interests apart from trash tv. Petty in her insults. She get a abusive both verbally and physically. Controlling

I’m ever Hopeful she will wake up one day and be back to her best.

I’m Heart broken today. Even worse I’m in Europe away from the famiky.

Suddenly her problems have smacked me in the face. Clear as day. I don’t know what to do.

We have so much to lose.

[Author]

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