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I totally get it. My thoughts are really negative this time of night too. I really struggle to turn them off. I tend to listen to a podcast or something to take my mind away…
lack of contact is so hard isn’t it. All we want to do is message them or phone them. That’s why I haven’t suggested the no contact when he is out because I just don’t think I could do it or actually be feeling a lot worse than I do now.
I’m so sorry that you have been cheated on in all of this too. That cannot be easy. I hope that you are able to work through it and get the best outcome for both of you. It’s a hard thought to think of them with someone else and having what you so desperately wanted.
perhaps call him tomorrow?My guy is out right now and probably won’t be in till tomorrow morning, I’m hoping I can go to sleep soon with a podcast or something you take my mind off it.
Thanks so much, you’re right. I know it isn’t his intentions either and he is trying so hard, some days harder than others. But I cannot help feel disrespected or cheated on in some way. We’ve spoke so much about it and he knows how hurt I get but yet there still is no quick fix. And all I want is for him to be ok and for this feeling to go away.
you’re so good to be able to remove yourself and distract yourself. I always have the best intentions but the anxiety I have is too much sometimes to ignore. Which is wasted energy because it doesn’t do anything other than make me suffer!
Are you in regular contact with him at the moment? I saw you wrote about speaking to him next week? How is that going for you?x
Hi,
I really resonate with your story. I’m in a very similar situation although my partner refuses rehab. He is saying that when he comes to live with me next year it’ll all be gone. Whilst that is an interesting prospect – in the meantime I just feel totally lost and alone. I get so unhappy when he is on the coke.
How do you cope not talking to him or having contact with him when he is using? I’m thinking this may be better for us. At the moment I’m just arguing with him all the time. I feel unhappy and it doesn’t matter what I say or do it doesn’t change anything. I know it’s highly addictive and I thought honesty and opennness would help me feel better about it but it just makes me so frustrated and I feel really hurt by it.thank you for sending your story.