[lottie03]

Hi,

First off I’m sorry that you are going through this. I have just been through all of this and more with my now ex-partner.

I met him 2 and a half years ago and when I first met him all he did was drink, a usual amount like everyone does. He told me that he had been to rehab when he was younger because of a cocaine addiction but had been clean for two years – didn’t think anything else of it until he kept disappearing on nights out, kept meeting up with people randomly through the night and we would argue so bad when we together just so he could storm off and probably go and use. I was obviously oblivious because I had never been around drugs. He eventually told me that he was using again and I gave him an ultimatum; I didn’t want to be with someone who was into drugs so if he was going to use then I would leave. Long story short he lied to me for a whole year promising me that he hadn’t touched the stuff in months, but I found out that he had been taking it daily. After a breakup and him quitting his job where he used and a new start to our relationship I finally thought things were over. I like you wanted a life with him, we got engaged and we had a baby. We have recently split up because of other related issues and he had just used again for the first time in about a year. He failed a drug test.

I’m telling you this As I am literally living it, he will never ever change. No matter how much you read his messages or track his location or give him ultimatums or get him help, he won’t ever change. He may stop using drugs eventually on his own accord but nothing you do will ever make him stop. And trust me, marrying him and having his babies will only end in disaster. I’m now a single mum of a four month old baby and my ex is still running around doing cocaine like he’s single and not a dad.

I’m trying to save you anymore years of heartache and stress, because I’ve finally gotten to the place where I’m happy and even though he’s back using, it’s not my life it’s affecting. I hope you’re okay !

[Author]

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