[louise1505]

My son was similar his behaviour always goes bad wen he’s about! Like he craves attention from him he knows he doesn’t get I duno … I understand the financial side as it was similar to us we only rented but he hid so much money from me and then knew the money he did give me helped massively it’s still sane he will send money each month we have a set day but always sends wen he’s ready too in the past he’s known that wen it comes to that day he sends it iv always msg saying can u send money but no more I’d rather manage with out I’m slowly getting Bk in my own two feet and never again will I be financially dependent on a man even the best man in the world once u are u are stuck ! Iv got 3 kids and it’s really hard luckily I have an amazing mum who’s like a dad to my boys but it’s still been a struggle and cutting him off had meant doing it completely alone it’s been a struggle at times but my mental health my happiness is best it’s been in years – my kids are more settled and well behaved and they know little bits and we have to work as a team xx

[louise1505]

I’d love to know this too iv cut ties with my ex but no doubt wen he gets his head of his back side he will demand to see the kids before he disappears again – id like To know my rights can I stop him – if he takes me to court wat will be done how can I prove he has drug problems etc xx

[louise1505]

It’s unbelievable how many ppl I can relate to on here it’s saved my mind honestly thought I was loosing the plot and making things up in my head!!

I had the same abuse over any little mistake I’d make as a mother wen in reality I’m an amazing mum raising 3 kids alone!

He’d make comments that I’d eat too much or all I have to do is look at a burger or if I have a few drinks it’s watch how much ur drinking etc anything for a snide comment to put me down -iv never been bigger than a size 8 and hardly drink ! But iv developed massive anxiety over my weight I lost all self worth through him he’d never take me out and made em feel like he was ashamed wen really he just wanted to be somewhere else it all makes sense now but even now doesn’t seem like it can be real and someone can change so so much!

We my 7 yr old was born he wud never miss a bath time we were best friends inseparable but since my 2 year old has been born he’s probably bathed him twice in total that’s how much he’s changed – has no interest wat so ever!! Xxx

[louise1505]

He’s done it with loads of stuff over years said one thing then denied it he’s a narcissist i sware by it he knows wat he’s doing he’s so manipulative it’s untrue x

[louise1505]

It is even wen I’d bring it up he’d look me straight face and said I don’t know way ur taking about I don’t have a drug problem even though he admitted he’d laugh like I imagined it! It’s furiating I’d send txts pics of old memories so something would click – hence y I changed my number I knew that once I’d done that it would stop me – or I hope it does!!

I don’t even know where he’s living his family don’t but don’t seem to care ! It’s crazy like he lives another life and wveryone should just be ok with it like it’s normal lol xx

[louise1505]

I could have wrote ur post myself honestly same with all days outruined the craziness of me and how psycho I am ???? everything’s my fault I turn kids against him wen in reality they have just had enough of being let down!

It’s like grieving for someone it’s so hard . But letting go is definitely best for urself and the kids it makes u Ill … it’s the anger I can’t get past – I end up sending him loads msg trying to make him see and it gets me know where so iv changed my number in order to stop myself from doing so I’d he wants to contact me now he will have to write to me x

[louise1505]

I think by “wat Do I do now” I mean I guess I have no closure in a way I feel like I’ve invested so much time into him like last year I thought he was ill with depression I did so much for him and listened over and over I feel so angry that he’s almost just walked away to a new life and is denying everything- but I guess the fact he shows hardly any interest in the kids gives me answers of wat he’s up to!

It’s funny I do miss the old him incredibly and my family life but I was also happiest on my own last few months like a weight was lifted – I think u have waited a bit of him to come and admitt it all and be sorry but it isn’t happening! I need to really let go maybe get some therapy . I just have such anger like he’s got a way with it all and I’m picking up the pieces . I guess time will tell wat he’s doing and for me times a healer .

It’s not easy with the kids on my own but they give u the strength to carry on and bring so much happiness- I do have major guilt with them they have lost their dad and I feel terrible but it isn’t my fault I know that.

Xx

[louise1505]

Thank you xx

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