[lulu]

Hi there, I read your post and just had to comment. I can’t completely relate to you as it’s my ex partner that’s the addict and not one of my parents. but when I read your post it made me so sad as we have children together and I worry so much about the effect all this has on them, and will continue to have as they grow up. Firstly let me say you sound like an intelligent level headed lovely young woman and your dad is very lucky to have a daughter like you 🙂 Quite honestly if he is using again, and from my experiences it does sound like he may be, there isn’t a whole lot you can do for him. After many years of trying to help my ex you eventually come to realise that an addict really will only get better, and stay that way, if they honestly truly want to. All you can do is be there for him if he needs it, an ear if he needs to talk that sort of thing. You could confront him, he may tell you the truth he may lie. You can offer to help him find support if he wants it through things like Addaction, a rehab clinic, the gp. but then it’s up to him. Sometimes we have to just accept that this is the hand we were dealt. Your dad may never be ‘normal’, but just let him know you love him and are there for him and hopefully he can get back on track and continue to be a support to you like you said he was a while back and be the best dad to you that he is able to be. He sounds like a lovely person, despite his addiction. My ex is also very intelligent and artistic and loves his children to bits. There are lots of dads out there who don’t even have an addiction and are absolutely useless fathers who couldn’t give a stuff about their kids. Remember that. and do not ever feel bad for the way you felt, acted, things you might have said when you were younger, it is such a lot to cope with and they are completely normal things to go through when someone you love is an addict.

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