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You’re doing all the right things. Maybe get him to go to a physical meeting and you go with him the first time. NA telephone number is listed on here also. Good luck ????
So sorry to hear your sons problems with addiction. Addiction affects the whole family. My husband is a recovering addict and has been clean 3 years. He has a sponsor and sponsees. He never wanted to give up taking drugs. He went to NA to appease me, and something clicked with him. The first couple of years or so he wasn’t really clean as he was drinking alcohol. Then he started again, got a sponsor and started working the 12 step programme. He has put the work in. Recovery is possible. We have two daughters and it has been hard over the years. But now finally we can see a change. No lies. No addict behaviour. He isn’t perfect, no one is. He is clean and serene, one day at a time. Please don’t give up on your loved ones, but do have boundaries. That’s one thing I stuck to. At First I used to enable. To be honest at times it’s hard to know what to do. Good luck all of you ????
So sorry to hear your sons problems with addiction. Addiction affects the whole family. My husband is a recovering addict and has been clean 3 years. He has a sponsor and sponsees. He never wanted to give up taking drugs. He went to NA to appease me, and something clicked with him. The first couple of years or do he wasn’t really clean as he was drinking alcohol. Then he started again, got a sponsor and started working the 12 step programme. He has put the work in. Recovery is possible. We have two daughters and it has been hard over the years. But now finally we can see a change. No lies. No addict behaviour. He isn’t perfect, no one is. He is clean and serene, one day at a time. Please don’t give up on your loved ones, but do have boundaries. That’s one thing I stuck to. At First I used to enable. To be honest at times it’s hard to know what to do. Good luck all of you ????
Definitely go to an NA meeting. You will find a list online of meetings in your area. You will get a big welcome. My husband is a recovering addict. He is 3 years clean with the help of the fellowship of NA. You owe it to yourself to grab recovery either both hands and get your life back. Good luck.
You are powerless. You are suffering from the disease of addiction. Find an NA meeting in your area. They are on most nights of the week. You will be welcomed and find many others in your predicament. And many more who are recovering, with many years clean. They are waiting fir you. Good luck.
Sorry to hear of your husband’s addiction. My husband is also an addict. A recovering addict with over 3 years clean of all substances including alcohol which is of course a drug. We went through many ups and downs and he was in denial. Without telling you the whole story, everything came to a head. He was going to lose me, after many chances. I stuck to my guns and he went to NA. He didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to stop. He went initially to appease me. He went for a long time but continued to drink which of course led bk to drugs. But eventually through working the programme, attending regular meetings and getting service in NA he finally managed to stay clean. I drug tested him at first. Now I don’t need to but could if I wanted. Trust is back. But I will say this. The programme of NA is for life, just one day at a time. Hope you can gey your husband to get some help. Stick to your guns with what you say and let him know what b is at stake…..Meant to say, we have two daughters xx
My husband also had an affair during active addiction and also resented the fact I had asked him to stop taking drugs. He also sought the company of people who were also using or who were telling him what he was doing was OK We also never had any money although we both worked. We have two daughters. He is now 3 years clean and working a 12 step programme in NA. It took ages before any of the recovery stuff happened. Years infact….But now we have trust and he has clarity. He does love you. He just doesn’t love himself and is trying to fill a void with whatever, whether drugs, sex, attention. All selfish behaviour is a part of active addiction. Don’t give up hope. I really hope he finds recovery. In the meantime you look after yourself and your kids as best you can.
He had to leave some friends behind or at least stay intouch with the ones who support his recovery. He has new friends also in NA. All have been where he has been and understand the struggles. It does need massive change. But then what’s the alternative. At first they think they can control their drug use and are in denial about being an addict. NA is a programme to be worked. If worked it works. They can’t at first imagine a life without drug use. But it just needs to be one day at a time. Recovery is possible. Sending you hugs.
There’s always that ‘friend’ who says you work hard you’re allowed to have fun. A friend of my husband who can use only recreational times said to my husband he didn’t think NA was for my husband. I’ve had other so called friends in the past supply him with drugs.
NA requires a twelve step programme and its not enough stopping drugs it’s staying stopped. Its recommended you have a sponsor who guides you through the steps. You are recommended to get service within NA. All these things help. They have a thing they say ‘keep coming back’. It hasn’t been easy. He didn’t really work a true programme at first and thought he could drink. But of course that led back to drugs. I also don’t drink now in support. Not saying everyone should do that. He now has good friends who encourage him to stay clean. If people encourage you to use they are not true friends and need avoiding. Good luck. Its a bumpy road that’s for sure.
Not sure about why your asking about hobbies, but he works full time. Builds scooters. Family days out. Works his programme and attends meetings and gives service within NA. We go out dancing (soul music). Go out to eat. Go on holiday. Pretty usual family stuff. But if anyone hasn’t family or needs new friends NA offers that too. The friendship there is amazing and they go camping and nights out for a curry or whatever. Meet for coffee.
Been through this for years with my husband who is an addict. He found NA thank god. He didn’t initially want to go or to stop using, but went to appease me. And in attending those meetings and doing stepwork (12 step programme), the unbelievable happened. He has been clean for 3 years now. I used to drug test him at first….The meetings are all over the country and on most evenings and weekends. We are so grateful. NA has given us bk a husband/dad that doesn’t lie, doesn’t steal, doesn’t use drugs and is more present in our lives. Good luck ????
Can’t recommend enough NA which is for any drug (alcohol is a drug). There you will find people that are or have been in the same situation as yourself. You will be made welcome and they say the newcomer is the most important person in the room. My husband is an addict has been clean for 3 years by attending NA and working their 12 step programme. Good luck ????
The number for NA (Narcotics Anonymous) is on this website. Ring them. Find out where meetings are in your area. Get him to go. Go with him. My husband has been clean 3 years now through working the 12 step programme of NA. He initially only went to appease me, with no intention of stopping but he kept attending meetings and through the help he got in those meetings he has managed to stay clean. And become a better version of himself. Good luck. ????