[mefirst]

I have recently made my husband move out because of his cocaine abuse! we have two children and I need to protect them and me. I found out he was using a year ago…he has promised to stop, cried, and manipulated me and my emotions into feeling guilty over and over agian. I always knew deep down inside that the right thing to do was to make him move out, but i know its difficult. This is my advice to you. First of all YOU are not selfish!! you need to think of your own wellbeing, you cant sacrifice yourself for the sake of someone elses addiction. This is not a light matter, even though the addicts intentions are sincere at the time he promises to quit, the drug has such a strong hold on the addict so he will undoubtedly slip over and over again, you staying with him only enables it, Don´t get stuck covering up for your husband, financially, and emotionally. the best way for him to get help is if you have 0 tolerance for his use, meaning you leave him. He needs to own his own problem!! only then might he be able to quit if he truly wants to. Get out of this relationship, nothing good will come of it. He will need a lot of support, but don´t feel bad if you dont have the strength to give it to him, what you can do is help him find the support, talk to his family and friends, be open about this problem, there is help out there… If he manages to quit and is healthy, then you can start thinking about if you want to get back together, but don´t rush into anything give it time…cocaine addicts can go for long periods of time without using and then fall back into it. Do not let him destroy your life, and mental health.

[Author]

Posts