[nikkit]

I truly don’t have any family I can turn to at all, my friend who I would have confided in lost her partner suddenly 2 weeks ago tomorrow and is still in the very early stages of bereavement and I’m supporting her at the moment so I really don’t want to put any more on her shoulders she’s enough going on without my troubles so tbh this is the only place I have at the moment and you wouldn’t believe how grateful I am that someone’s replied! I like straight talking and sometime being harsh is needed to get the message through so I appreciate it honestly.

I just wish I could find the strength to end the marriage I really do, I’ve involved his mum now and sent him there while I have some time to gather myself which I’ve never done before so I’m hoping it’s the start of me standing up to this addiction he’s got. I love obviously I do I wouldn’t have stayed 20 years, your right it’s having to face the unknown that’s the scary part! He’s all I’ve ever know so it’s going to be hard but I have to be brave and face the reality of being married to a cocaine addict. Thankyou for your advise it really has helped me to see I can’t save him and I need to save myself from him and his addiction

[nikkit]

Thanks for the reply, It makes sense. seeing it in black and white makes it more real that I need to put myself first for a change! We’ve been together 20 years married 18 next month and I think about all the years wasted if I walk away but like you said I need to put me first now! I find out where he’s been as he’s not very good at covering his tracks and he eventually gives in and tells me all the sordid details in the end. Your right I need out of this marriage so seeing as I’m the one acting like an adult I think it’s time I got those black bags out and sent him on his way. It’s gonna be hard I know as I really don’t have a support network to lean on but I’ve got to save myself first I suppose. Again thanks for the reply, it’s helped me realise why I already knew tbh bit have been too afraid to do but it’s got to be done enough enough!

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