Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
I’m so sorry for your loss. What an awful thing to do to you, leaving you to go to the hospital alone
Just saw your post and wanted to say that I was where you are now. I found out when I was 6 months pregnant. He told me had a coke problem. Begged me for help. So I stayed. Only he lied for months about getting help and then he told me it was crack not coke that he had a problem with.
I developed pregnancy complications because of what he was putting me through. I did the entire pregnancy by myself too. He abused me the entire way way through. Even came to the hospital high when I was in labour. He arrived hours after I called him and left the minute I gave birth. He disappeared for a 3 days shortly after and told me he wanted to kill himself.
Long story short, 14 months later nothing had improved. In fact things got worse in terms of his abusive behaviour. He has left me with tens of thousands of pounds with of debt and a baby he has never contributed towards financially. On top of that he was never around to help or be a family as was always out getting high or in bed until the afternoon recovering.
I’ve lost count of how many times he has promised to get help. All lies. So many lies. About everything. He was stealing from me while I slept and his manipulation knows no bounds. He would say literally anything to get the money or to get away with not being found out. Even asking him to move out didnt help. The relationship is now over and he has lost everything. His baby, his home, his car and me. Managed to hold onto this job so far. Time will tell if this is enough to make him get help. He tells me he is taking me to court to get access to our baby, so I guess i will find out at some point if he is clean or not but even if he manages a couple of months I would be amazed if he stayed clean…
It is the most heartbreaking thing I have ever been through. I really hope you and your baby are doing ok. If he wants you both in his life my advice would be to let him prove it to you. I was drug testing him every 3 days. Of course he was failing. That is when everything fell apart because he couldn’t keep up the lies anymore. He has to want to get clean more than anything else and he will probably have to loose everything to get there.