[sad-and-tired]

I am so sorry, and sad to say I can relate to everything you have said. No help I know but I am going through the same thing. My son now has lost his car insurance, has the court chasing him for unpaid fines, and has just about lost his job. He lays in bed all the time he is here and I am sick of it. I even told him I wished I had never given birth to him, I am so sick of his verbal abuse, debts and lies….I hate what he has become and am so ashamed of what he is. I am leaving him to it now, I cannot do anymore but of course it is all my fault…….

[sad-and-tired]

fingers crossed for you xxxx

[sad-and-tired]

he has already sold every thing he can, he has stolen from me. He has nothing except the car which is on finance. When I looked after his card for him, he waited till I had sorted everything out and then started to demand his card, he can get very verbally aggressive and yes he has begged for £50 to pay a debt…..I am worried that he has taken heroin. I have never found needles but I did find a stained teasoon and small fork with the top cup bit stained, I confronted him but he said I am paranoid it was food stain. Didn’t look like that to me. So we go on one bit of chaos to the next. I have found I am getting harder, I know its what I have to do, I keep hoping I am wrong about what he is doing but I cant see where all this money would be going otherwise. Sadly he may have to be on his knees before he wants to start coming back up.

[sad-and-tired]

no you have no choice, I have struggled on with my son for what seems like a long long time. I have paid his debts and got him straight numerous times, thinking he will get himself together and he hasn’t. He now faces the prospect of no money to get to work and his car insurance terminated, his car will be repossessed before much longer and I can see he will lose his job. For the first time I am letting it happen, and I feel really bad but I cant do anymore, he was paid last Friday went out Friday night and Saturday night and spent the lot. How am I meant to keep up with that. If he doesn’t sort himself out I will end up kicking him out. Like you son he says everything is my fault, whatever it is. Well, sorry no its not, its his choices that have brought him to this. I hope he is not touching heroin, I know certainly coke and other stuff. How would you know if it is heroin. Don’t know why I ask it is just something that feels like it would be the worst thing he could be doing, and it worries me…….

[sad-and-tired]

xena, I am so sorry, what an awful nightmare for you. I am also sad for the other persons family. These drugs and their dealers infect so many people and lives…..

[sad-and-tired]

yes it comes as a shock to realise all the times you thought you were being a good mum and helping them out with cash they were just using us. What you have said is exactly how I feel, I cant let my 22 year old son drag me down with him, I have worked hard all my life, its not right and its not fair that I now have to use my cash to line dealers pockets.
It is very hard to kick them out, I have tried and he gets abusive and short of getting him by the scruff of the neck how do I do it. I managed to get him out a while back for a week but he did try getting back in by hammering on the door and putting his foot in. its just a nightmare that I want to end, I want my son back. xxxx

[sad-and-tired]

I am in the same position, my son has been on tag and back to court for breaching it. I am at the point where I know its only a matter of time before he is sent to prison and I hate to say it but at least I will know where he is… how sad is that. And yes it effects my family big time. I don’t sleep and most of my time is spent thinking about him or panicking because he has phoned or text not once but maybe two dozen times to demand something usually money. I know how you feel. I hope to god there will be a good outcome for all of us. xxx

[sad-and-tired]

I am so sorry, this is where I am with my son, I kicked him out for a week but was worried about where he was, when he text to come back I made it easy for him to get back, at least I know he is safe and eating…….I think sometimes that the more you do for them the less they care. I believe we just have to go with it, there is nothing else you can do. We are spectators in their awful lives….. good luck xx

[sad-and-tired]

Thanks Patricia, I will email you if that’s ok xx

[sad-and-tired]

Patricia, if you want to leave your email address for me, I will contact you. my situation sounds like yours may have done a while back. xx or a mobile number. Would be good to be able to speak to someone.

[sad-and-tired]

sent it again. let me know if you get it x

[sad-and-tired]

patricia I have emailed carol and fifi 55 and asked for your email address, I hope that is alright. I don’t want to put mine on the site. xxx

[sad-and-tired]

its not easy to be hard on your child, its natural to want to protect. God I know that so well, but I wont give money now, he is living with me so I know he is eating and where he is which is something. I wont help with his debts anymore because it doesn’t help long term just gives him more cash to use on what he wants. you are right no one knows the worry and hell drugs cause until they have been there. xx stay strong

[sad-and-tired]

Hi both, if you don’t mind I will email as well. I am going through the same, I went to open road yesterday for a family session, guess what the family sessions are being cut due to funding in march. help for the family is so important. My son has court fines which he hasn’t been paying, I have tried to sort this out but he is now not paying again. Sometimes it feels as if he is pushing a self distruct button and I don’t know why. xxx

[sad-and-tired]

Thank you, he is back once again, I had a talk to him yesterday, not sure how much good it will do though…..but at least I know where he is and if he is eating. He tells me I am paranoid, but then he would wouldn’t he. I can already see that he is prioritising his own needs rather than paying his bills, I have recently got him up to date with everything again. This time I will leave his finances and what happens will happen……xxx

[Author]

Posts