[savedbygrace]

Hi justme1,

I hope that by sharing some of my story that you can see and feel hope in your situation.

A few months into marriage, the day I secretly dreaded happened, my husband relapsed. It broke my heart because everything seemed ok, we were happy and it’s like he took his eye off the ball and became ensnared again to the evil that is drugs.

I believe that because we are tripartite beings (body,soul and spirit), that taking drugs is a spiritual as well as physical or psychological problem. It is an illness, but also a choice. Medication and counselling can deal with the physical and psychological side of things but only God can deal with the spiritual. What I mean by this is I prayed, I read my bible to find scriptures of comfort that I could meditate upon and also rely on to increase my faith to believe God for the impossible to happen I.e. Setting the man that I love dearly free from the unseen darkness that would lure someone into taking something so deadly, attractive.

It really knocked me for six because there was no rhyme or reason for this madness and heartache that he was putting me through by his choices, but what got me through was my faith in Jesus Christ, even at my weakest point I held on if only but barely, but there were a few people at my church that knew what we were going through and they’d pray for us/me and always encouraged us that no situation is ever to hard for God.

I eventually stopped becoming an enabler and blaming myself for the situation, acknowledging that he is an adult and is responsible for his choices, regardless of what he may have been through in the past, there is always a choice.

Within a few months he was engaging with his drug worker very slowly but surely, and was receiving medication and counselling. It’s been a slow and steady process but we’re getting there. We continue to trust in Jesus Christ that all things are possible through Him if we believe. My husband now encourages others who are held captive by the evil that is drugs, and other things, and many have been helped.

You don’t deserve to be abused whether emotionally or physically, neglect is abuse too! I allowed myself to be emotionally abused for a while, to the point where I tried to take my life, until I stopped being an enabler and blaming myself as mentioned above.

I can’t stress enough how central and key our relationship with Jesus Christ has been in helping me as an individual, my husband as an individual and helping our marriage get back on track. I had to do much forgiving and allowing my broken heart to be healed, it hasn’t been overnight, but one heck of a journey. I love my husband more than ever, warts and all.

I would like to leave this scripture with you from the book of Matthew Chapter 11 verses 28-30, that I hope will provide comfort and be a catalyst for change in your life:
28Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.
29Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
30For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

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