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I totally understand what you’re saying and I was also thinking the same ????

I feel like he is telling me everything I want to hear right now but doesn’t mean it. I am following him all over, when he nips to the toilet I am sat at the stairs waiting for him, he went to his mams yesterday and I just kept thinking he was going to buy some. I feel bad because I have told him how much it has affected me over the past few months. I am on medication for my mental health and Im constantly thinking that I must not be good enough for him, or have i given him a reason to take cocaine.

I’ve asked him if he would tell me if he ever felt or thought about getting some and he said he would. But he also asked me to stop talking about it because he has absolutely no interest in it at all.

But I cant just forget about it. I find myself asking him questions daily and I am worried if this is an addiction, am I making it every more difficult for him with my constant questions and concerns.

The first day he said he would delete the number, then a couple of days later he said no because it is a mate that he has known for years and he doesn’t want to cut him out.

I just don’t know what to do for the best, am I best just letting him get on with it and try and trust him, or do I keep checking he is OK, had no cravings, not going to buy any etc. I have been an absolute b**ch to him and I regret the way I went on massively ????

We both had a little drink last night, he only had 3 bottles of lager, the whole time I just sat with him thinking do I need to keep him entertained so he doesn’t think about it. we sat up until he decided it was time to go to bed and he even left half his bottle of lager which he never does.

So I think it has now been 2 weeks since he had any. I suppose time will tell ????

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Hi Danman, thank you so much for all your help. So the wipes came and I wiped all over over downstairs toilet and there it was, all over! I am absolutely heartbroken. He admitted it all and is glad I know because he would like to stop. He doesn’t think it’s a problem however I have my concerns because he admitted on his last night out that he tried so hard not to have any but he ended up doing it.

He has been really open and honest with me, I have asked him to delete this person’s number but I really don’t think that is going to help because if he really wanted some then all his mates do it anyway so he could easily get his hands on some.

I have told him I am concerned about him drinking and this triggering it. He said he doesn’t want to cut out alcohol and that he wants to see how it goes after he’s had a drink to see if it is or is not an addiction, then take it from there.

I have literally just stopped crying from it all. He has agreed to doing the tests to put my mind at ease, i just feel like I can’t relax now its the weekend.

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This is going to sound really strange danman but can I ask a personal question too… if your girlfriend asked you outright when you were taking it, would you have told the truth or lied about it? What is the best way to approach to get the truth from someone who is taking it? I feel I have took the wrong approach now by threatening to kick him out ????

I have just ordered cocaine detection wipes and I am going to try them on the window sill where the scratches are.

Also can I ask when you were doing it at home on your home, how many times would you take it/how often? Would the runny nose come on immediately after the ‘toilet trip’ and would you then spend the following day blowing your nose?

Again I am so sorry for all the personal questions. You comments on mine and other posts are so very helpful.

Smarker – you sound just like me. Its the constant thought of am I just being paranoid or is this real.

My partner denied it all yesterday and hasn’t spoke to me since. And now I’m sat thinking surely if someone is innocent they would want prove/argue their innocence. But no, I’ve not had a single word from him since his one word denial.

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Danman that is amazing. Well done you. I have read many of your posts and you should be so very proud.

I have plucked the courage up to ask him today and he has denied it. Which I knew he would do. He knows that he would be out of our house and back at his mums if I found out so I wasn’t surprised he denied it. I dont know what else I can do.

I think he thinks I am so naive and clueless (which I am in a way) but I feel like he’s treating me like a mug.

I have thought about getting some tests online but wasn’t sure how accurate they were or if he would actually do one. And I know this is insane but I have been tempted to plant the go pro behind a plant pot as the downstairs toilet rarely gets used, infact it’s only him that uses it on a weekend ???? but I didnt really want to do that.

I have even checked search history on his computer, he sits on betting sites until 3-4am every weekend.

Deep down I just hope I am wrong.

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Sorry must have been a similar name ????

How did you confront your partner? Did you have proof he was taking it or were you just suspicious like me?

Part of me wants to just find something, I have searched the bins on a Sunday morning in the hope I would find the slightest clue, but nothing. He is either really clever at hiding or I really am paranoid ????

The main clue for me is the scratch lines on out window sills. There’s one going along and then 3 parallel going down, literally in line with where you would do it if you were sitting on the toilet seat.

I have never done coke before so I have no idea anything about it really. He has a couple of friends that deal, more than one has already been locked up.

Although it’s not nice reading or hearing other people’s stories it kind of helps to know I am not the only one in this position.

I joined a while ago but never posted incase people thought I was stupid for not just getting to the point and asking him.

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Hi warriorgurl,

Thank you. I need to get the courage and come straight out and ask him. Deep down I really feel like he is but part of me is in denial that he would do this in the house where our kids are.

How are things now with you and your bf? I think I read a few of your posts at the weekend too.

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