[thelittleonex]

Eja.. I fully understand the way you feel towards him, I am completely the same. I have to go to therapy every week because my mind just can’t handle the million thoughts that go through it every day, they are the same ones over and over again.. i love him I want to be with him but every second I think about what he has done and it tears me apart again. I want to make it work for the baby, also because our relationship was absolutely awesome and its not something I just want to give up on.. I’ve not told him my thoughts cos how do you tell someone that you wake up each day and think about leaving them. He’s says im his rock and he can’t do it without me. I think he’s getting there with his addiction as its been 7weeks and he says he’s had nothing, but i just have to believe him. Xx

[thelittleonex]

It is strange indeed.. I think it’s because it’s not a person, its a substance and an addiction.. cocaine effects people in different ways ive heard if people having no libido and issues with their penis shrinking but I’ve also heard that people have had the best sex on it. I’ve never been through it before either which is why I didn’t understand it but now I’ve spoke about it to a few people they have said they know someone who has done it or their partners have xx

[thelittleonex]

Bella85.. I really wish my partner would just say he has cheated cos I would just up and go, but the unknown is the thing that is destroying me. If he fails the drugs test then I will go because I dont want that around me or the baby. It’s not a nice thing but I’m glad there are some others out there who have had similar experiences because when he said Aw its nothing and that nothings happened I felt like it was just a huge load of bullshit, but supposedly a lot of men do it ????

[thelittleonex]

Firebee, its a really difficult situation to be in. When I looked more into his account he had on that he would travel to meet people, but is adamant he hasn’t. He works nights and I work days, so how do I know this hasn’t happened, just have to believe him but it’s hard to believe someone who’s been lying to you. I understand your feelings towards the paraphenalia, id want to believe its not his too but are we just kidding ourselves because we don’t want to lose them? I constantly question things, like money. I have even checked to see if there’s any ’emptys’ lying about, but I’m driving myself crazy with it. I’ve ordered a drug test off the internet for coke use, just waiting to randomly get him to take it and we will see what happens. He said he’s been clean since I found out im just not sure anymore.

[thelittleonex]

It helps a great deal, my brother went through similar and I hated him for it instead of trying to help him I regret that but think it was easier to shut it out than deal with it, this is a lot different. I’m at the drs next week because before today ive felt down in the dumps just thought it was normal but been advised it could be mild prenatal depression so best get it checked out then today happened and I feel like a complete fruit loop so hoping they will help out. I dont care what people say but i have a short fuse and if someone said something id just blow. I really hope you get sorted with your son

[thelittleonex]

Thank you for your reply. It’s absolutely horrendous, I’ve had to leave for a few days. He’s mortified by what hes done you can see it, he’s terrified to lose everything.. The drugs I can deal with and will help him with but the things he done on them is heartbreaking and has made me question everything. I want as little people to know because I dont want them judging but i need guidance and support too.

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